[_]giv me ur numba?
[_]kis me?
[_]lt me kss u?
[_]wtch a mvie wi me?
[_]lt me tke u ou 2 dnna?
[_]tke a shwr wi me?
[_]b me bf/gf?
[_]tke me hme 4 d nit?
[_]Wd u lt me slp in ur bed?
[_]giv me a pggybk rde?
[_]Dnce wi me?
[_]Spnk dt ass?
[_]Hlp me wi hw?
[_]Tckle me?
[_]Lt me tckle u?
[_]Ply strp pker wi me?
[_]Say yea if i askd u out?
[_]Gt wsted wi me?
[_]Greet me in publc?

D0 U...
[_]tnk im fit?
[_]tnk im hot?
[_]wnt 2 kiss me?
[_]wnt 2 cddle wi me?
[_]wnt 2 hook up wi me?
[_]tnk im wrd
R WE...
[_]frnds?
[_]in a reltnshp?
[_]gna hav kds?
[_]enmies?
AM i...
[_]sxy?
[_]cte?
[_]funy?
[_]cool?
[_]lovble?
[_]adrble?
[_]Annyn?
[_]grt 2b wi?
[_]attrctve?
[_]mean?

HAV U EVA...
[_]taut bou me?
[_]taut der mite b an "us"?
[_]taut bou hkin up wi me?
[_]fnd urslf wntn a kss frm me?
[_]wshd i wr dr?
[_]grbbed me?
[_]fancied me?
[_]wnted my nmba?
[_]had a dream bou me?
[_]been distracted by me?

Little Johnny was 7 years old and like
other boys
his age rather curious. He had been
hearing quite
a bit
about 'making out' from the older boys,
and he
wondered what it was and how it was
done. One
day he took his question to his mother,
who
became rather flustered. Instead of
explaining
things to Johnny, she told him to hide
behind the
curtains one night and watch his older
sister and
her boyfriend.

This he did.

The following morning, Johnny described
EVERYTHING
to his mother.

"Sis and her boyfriend sat and talked for
a while,
then he turned off most of the lights.
Then he
started kissing and hugging her. I
figured 'Sis
must be getting sick, because her face
started
looking funny. He must have thought so
too,
because he put his hand inside her
blouse to feel
her heart, just the way the doctor would.
Except
he's not as smart as the doctor because he
seemed to have trouble finding her heart.
I guess
he was getting sick too, because pretty
soon both
of them started panting and getting all
out of
breath. His other hand must have been
cold
because he put it under her skirt. About
this
time 'Sis got worse and began to moan
and sigh
and squirm around and slide down
toward the end
of the couch. This was when her fever
started. I
knew it was a fever, because Sis told him
she felt
really hot. Finally, I found out what was
making
them so sick-a big eel had gotten inside
his pants
somehow. It just jumped out of his pants
and
stood there, about 10 inches long,
honest, anyway
he grabbed it in one hand to keep it from
getting
away. When Sis saw it, she got really
scared-her
eyes got big, and her mouth fell open,
and she
started calling out to God and stuff like
that. She
said it was the biggest one she's ever
seen; I
should tell her about the ones down at
the lake by
our house! Anyway, Sis got brave and
tried to kill
the eel by biting its head off. All of a
sudden she
grabbed it with both hands and held it
tight while
he took a muzzle out of his pocket and
slipped it
over the eel's head to keep it from biting
again. Sis
lay back and spread her legs so she could
get a
scissor-lock on it and he helped by lying
on top of
the eel. The eel put up a hell of a fight.
Sis started
groaning and squealing and her
boyfriend almost
upset the couch. I guess they wanted to
kill the
eel by squashing it between them. After a
while
they both quit moving and gave a great
sigh. Her
boyfriend got up, and sure enough, they
killed the
eel. I knew because it just hung there,
limp, and
some of its insides were hanging out. Sis
and her
boyfriend were a little tired from the
battle, but
they went back to courting anyway. He
started
hugging
and kissing her again. By golly, the eel
wasn't
dead! It jumped straight up and started to
fight
again. I guess eels are like cats- they
have nine
lives or something. This time, Sis jumped
up and
tried to kill it by sitting on it. After about a
35
minute struggle, they finally killed the
eel. I
knew it was dead, because I saw Sis's
boyfriend
peel its
skin off and flush it down the toilet.