facts of the pumb
some simple facts regarding stuart ferguson.


.When Arnold says the line "I'll be back" in the first Terminator movie it is implied that is he going to pumba for help.

.pumba does not follow fashion trends, they follow him. But then he turns around and kicks their ass. Nobody follows pumba.


Archeologists in India recently uncovered a new dinosaur. It’s actually many dinosaurs but one is in the middle of all the others. The one in the middle is believed to have killed the others with a single roundhouse kick to the face. The archeologists wanted to call it pumbasaures but the Indian government changed the name to Himotosaurous because it’s simply not possible for pumba to be killed.

pumba smells what the Rock is cooking... because the Rock is pumba's personal chef


pumba appeared in the "Street Fighter II" video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to say "I AM READY. When asked about this "glitch," pumba replied, "That's no glitch."


When pumba's wife burned the turkey one Thanksgiving, pumba said, "Don't worry about it honey," and went into his backyard. He came back five minutes later with a live turkey, ate it whole, and when he threw it up a few seconds later it was fully cooked and came with cranberry sauce. When his wife asked him how he had done it, he gave her a roundhouse kick to the face and said, "Never question Stuart ferguson!

Its that time of year again- the decorating, the fake smiles and the anoyin family relatives. its gotta b christmas!

don't u just hate it. the preperation begins december 1st. pumbs dragged away from ur current msn activities and made go upstairs or outside n bring the decorations in from the loft or the shed. he spends 3 hours unwinding the christmas lights and try's his best to wrap them bonily around the tree, which is too big and been stashed in the corner with all the needles falling from it already.pumb turns the lights on ... they don't work. next 3 hours checking every individual light!. he go to bed, happy thats its over.

he gets up the next morning and discover mum has been generous and bought a chocolate advent calendar. pumb hates advent calendar's!, he spend hours lookin the the box with no 1 on it and generally eat the whole calendar there and then.

The big days gettin closer. and pumbs starting to wonder what to buy them for christmas. pumb goes 2 the shops, which have been decorated with mini santa's 4 the occation. he try's finding boots 2 get the usaul perfume for her. however uve forgotten wat she likes, he buy sumthing cheap. he ends up gettin him something digital and high tech to make sure theres a chance he might not like in which case he can move in and claim it for himself. All this time you've got anoyin aunts n uncles grans and grandads asking what your wanting!, its hell.

The morning of christmas arrives. every1's excited and tryn get you out of bed, pumb can't b bothered. There was a time when he'd be 1st down, not any more. The warm pillow is a much better idea. he eventually drags himself up and heads downstairs. he arrive, all eyes r upon him as if looking for a weakness to exploit. the typical question is asked "which one you going open 1st then?" he grunts back a reply. A presant is thrust in2 pumbs hand. he open it, half asleep. he discovers whats inside with displeasure and a touch of anger erects from within the mind as they never got him wat was requested. he then must do an oscar winning acting perormance for the rest of the day as more unwanted presants r opend.

The festivities r almost over...Ive forgotten something u say? ahh yes the dinner/lunch. how hidious it is. More turkey, sprouts, potatoes, carrots and chritmas pud than even scott fraser cld eat!

One more hurdle remains before he's conquered it for another year, the boxing day hangover. Then hes in the home straits headin for a FUN celebration,new year! cos nothing ever goes wrong as new year!...does it?

boys look at all the g star( pumb shoots his load at all the g- star clothes).

Sorry scott can't go on the shot cause i want to save my money for the g- star(pumb can't hack the shot so he comes away with some bull shit).

Lads check out all the rolex's got to get some of them for the old manand me, thats well cheap for the real thing.(Pumb buys a rolex's for 6 pound and trys to tell us all that it is real loser).

check out the tan i am loving it( pumb is that fake tan in your aftersan)yes it is but it das not make any differnts to my skin(pumb why do i have brown lines on my legs).

(pumb drunk) scott check that hot bird over there i might try and pull her.(pumb she is a fatty). so i need to pull her SO I CAN BE READY