Marsden - One. But it wont be her. She'll put a call through to the maintenance officer and wait for him to come change it.

Tawa - two. One to change the bulb and the other one trying to figure out how to get high off the other one.

Scots - none. mum or dad will do it

Queen Margaret - one. She holds the bulb and the world should revolve around her.

St Pats - none. Dooleys got no money take your broke ass home.

Rongotai - five. Four to break into the store and to steal the bulb and one to install it.

wanuimata College - One. But where the money's coming from to buy it is anyones guess.

Wellington Girls - five. One to change it two to make sure her hair ribbons are still in place and another two to tell her how good her new bag looks.

St Catherines - none. Pregnant girls shouldnt do risky things.

Wellington High - 10. One to change the bulb, one to call the dealer and eight to have a session while they wait.

Porirua - none. Everything that hasn't been welded down was stolen long ago.

Wellington East - none. They only have to give head to the Wellington Coll boys and it's done for them.

Silverstream - none. Electricity has yet to make it out that far.

Wellington Coll - two. One to change the bulb and the other to hold his hand while he climbs the really high ladder

Adapted From Teen Feng Shui, by Susan Levitt (Inner Traditions, 2003).

The ancient Chinese method of Feng Shui helps us to balance our homes and create happier, more successful lives, room by room.

At this time of year, with days growing shorter and nights getting long and chilly, we often turn our attention to the bedroom, the sanctuary where we can rest and recharge.

It’s easy to “map” your bedroom according to Feng Shui principles so you can create more harmony in the bedroom. Here’s how:

1. First, draw a roughly square outline of your bedroom on a piece of paper. The wall that has the primary entrance to your room in it should be the lower line of the square.

2. Divide the square into nine equal squares, three rows of 3 squares each.

3. Start with the lowest row of squares, that describes the areas when you first walk into your bedroom. The far left corner of the room when you first enter is the area of Knowledge. The center square relates to Career, and the right-hand square is Helpful People/Travel.

4. Now look at the central row of squares, that describes the middle of your bedroom. The far left square relates to Family/Health. The central square is the Tao, or Center, and the right-hand square is Creativity/Children.

5. Lastly, look at the top row of squares. The far left square relates to Wealth, the central square to Fame/Reputation, and the far right square to Relationships/Romance.

Your layout should look something like this:

Wealth-Fame/Reputation-Relationships/Romance

Family/Health-Tao-Creativity/Children

Knowledge-Career-Helpful People/Travel

6. Here are some objects that will work best for each area
of your room, helping you to attract more of what you need.

Knowledge: Bookcase, books, tools for self-development.

Career: Mirrors or water-related items. Images to support your career goals.

#If at first you don't succeed, you're not Chuck Norris.

# The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed miserably.

# If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds 'til." After you ask, "Two seconds 'til what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face.

# When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes, ever.

# Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves.

# There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.

# Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.

# A Handicapped parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.

# Someone once videotaped Chuck Norris getting pissed off. It was called Walker: Texas Chain Saw Masacre.

# If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win. Forever.

# Chuck Norris has two speeds: Walk and Kill.

# Someone once tried to tell Chuck Norris that roundhouse kicks aren't the best way to kick someone. This has been recorded by historians as the worst mistake anyone has ever made.

# Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.

# Time waits for no man. Unless that man is Chuck Norris.

# In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself.

# According to the Encyclopedia Brittanica, the Native American "Trail of Tears" has been redefined as anywhere that Chuck Norris walks.

# There are no steroids in baseball. Just players Chuck Norris has breathed on.


# When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet. Water gets Chuck Norrised.

# Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.

# #
# Chuck Norris CAN believe it's not butter.

# When taking the SAT, write "Chuck Norris" for every answer. You will score over 8000.

# Archeologists unearthed an old english dictionary dating back to the year 1236. It defined "victim" as "one who has encountered Chuck Norris

#
# The show Survivor had the original premise of putting people on an island with Chuck Norris. There were no survivors, and nobody is brave enough to go to the island to retrieve the footage.

# It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.

#
# Chuck Norris doesn't believe in Germany.

When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.

# Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.

# Chuck Norris is widely predicted to be first black president. If you're thinking to yourself, "But Chuck Norris isn't black", then you are dead wrong. And stop being a racist.

# When Chuck Norris plays Monopoly, it affects the actual world economy.

# As an infant, Chuck Norris' parents gave him a toy hammer. He gave the world Stonehenge.

# Chuck Norris once ordered a steak in a restaurant. The steak did what it was told.

#
# There’s an order to the universe: space, time, Chuck Norris.... Just kidding, Chuck Norris is first.

# In the X-Men movies, none of the X-Men super-powers are done with special effects. Chuck Norris is the stuntman for every character.

# We live in an expanding universe. All of it is trying to get away from Chuck Norris.

# If at first you don't succeed, you're not Chuck Norris.


# Nagasaki never had a bomb dropped on it. Chuck Norris jumped out of a plane and punched the ground.

#
# Chuck Norris is the only person to ever win a staring contest against Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder at the same time.

# Industrial logging isn't the cause of deforestation. Chuck Norris needs toothpicks


# Chuck Norris doesn't read