1. Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up every two hours?
2. If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
3. Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are flat?
4. Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough?
5. Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
6. Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?
7. Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
8. Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?
9. Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
10. Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?
11. What is the speed of darkness?
12. Are there specially reserved parking spaces for "normal" people at the Special Olympics?
13. If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?
14. If it's true that we are here to help others, what are the others doing here?
15. Do married people live longer than single ones or does it only seem longer?
16. Do you cry under water?
17. How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
18. Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
19. Did you ever stop and wonder...... Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these pink dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"
20. Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there... I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta its bum."
21. Why do toasters always have a setting so high that could burn the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
22. Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
23. Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their bum when they ask where the bathroom is?
24. Why does your Obstetrician, Gynaecologist leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?
25. Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
26. Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream??
27. If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?
28. (This one kills me!!!!!) If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?
29. If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
30. Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune? Stop singing and read on . . . . . . .
31. Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?
32. Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
33. Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive any faster?

G E N E R A L
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Full Name: Laura Catterall
Age: 19
Birthday: 1st August 1988
Siblings: 3 Brothers n A Sister
Shoe size: 6
Height: 5"8
Weight: About 9st last time i checked
What are you wearing right now: Me Pjs
Where do you live: Near Halton Road
piercings: Ears
Tattoos: No Id Pass Out

R E L A T I O N S H I P S
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Do you have a BF or GF?: No
do you like anyone?: Hmmm Kind Of
Do they like you?: Duno
Do You Love Anyone?: Me Family.. n Me Mates Of Course

F A V O U R I T E S
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Person: Me Mum
Favorite kind of pants: Jeans
Album from what band: Akon, Beyonce, James Morrisson!
TV show: Eastenders, Wags Boutique
Book: Cant Read Ha
Colour: Pink
Day: Friday
Date: 1st August
Number: 8
Boys Name: Not Got 1
Girls Names: Laura Obviously
Animal: Dog.. Only Wen There Puppys Tho
Month: December
Food: Maccys, Kfc, Tuna Pasta Bake mmmm

H A V E Y O U E V E R . . .
----------------------------------------------------------
Been Out With Someone: Ye
Kissed Someone: Ye
Kissed More Than One Person From The Same Sex?: No
Been With Someone: Ye
Given anyone a bath: Ye Me Baby Bro
Gone skinny dipping: No
Put your tongue on a frozen pole: No
Laughed so much it made you cry: Ye All The Time
Broken a bone: No Touch Wood!!
Played truth or dare: Ye
Played Spin The Bottle: Ye
Been in a physical fight: Ye
Been in a police car: No
Been on a plane: No
Come close to dying: Ye
Swam in the ocean: No Scared Of Sharks Ha
Ran away: Ye
Broken someones heart: Hope Not
Cried when someone died: Ye
Cried in school: Ye!!
Fell off your chair: Ye!!
Fallen for one of your best friends: No
Made out with JUST a friend: Ye
Used someone: No!!!
Been cheated on: Dont Think So

W H I C H. . .
----------------------------------------------------------------
Is Your good luck charm: Not Got One
Is Best song you ever heard: Theres 2 Many!
Bones Have You Broke?If Any: None
Your Favourite Day: Friday
Daddy Or Chips: Chips!!

E V E R H A D. . .
----------------------------------------
Chicken pox: Ye
Tonsilites: Ye
Stitches: Ye Butterfly Stiches Ha
Broken nose: Think Its Kinda Haf Broke
Black Eye: Ye
To Stay In Hospital: Ye Once

D O Y O U
----------------------------------------
Believe in love at first sight: No
Believe In heaven: Duno
Believe In Angels: No
Believe In Hell: Duno
Believe In Horoscopes: Duno But They R Always Rite
Who was the last person that called you: Forgot
Who was the last person you slow danced with: Cant Remember
Who makes you smile: Me Mates
Get On With Your Family: Ye Most Of The Time
Who Do You Live With?: Mum Bros N Sis

L A S T P E R S O N
---------------------
You yelled at: Mum
Who broke your heart: No1
Who told you they loved you: Me Ex
Whos your loudest friend: Prob Kerriann She Doesnt Shut Up

A R E Y O U . . .
------------------------
Obsessive: No
Jelous: Not Really!! Can Be Tho!
A Piss Head: Ye
A Sex Addict: No
A Bitch: Can Be Sumtimes
A Fighter Or A Lover: Bit Of Both
A Cheater: No
A Good Girl/Boi: haha Ye Course I Am