***Guy's point of view ****

> This is very cute!> And even written by a guy!

> You might agree with it, but

> when it actually happens 99% of girls don't realize it 'til it is too late epg

> and that guy who did it is so frustrated that he has moved on to someone who

> will take notice.


> From a guys point of view:

> We don't care if you talk to other guys.

> We don't care if you're friends with other guys.

> But when you're sitting next to us, and some random guy walks into the room

> and you jump up and tackle him without even introducing us, yeah, it pisses us off.

> It doesn't help if you sit there and talk to him for ten minutes without

> even acknowledging the fact that we're still there.

> We don't care if a guy calls you, but at 2 in the morning we do get a little concerned.

> Nothing is that important at 2 a.m. that it can't wait till he morning.

> Also, when we tell you you're pretty/beautiful/gorgeous/cute/ stunning, we freaking mean it.

> Don't tell us we're wrong.We'll stop trying to convince you.

> The sexiest thing about a girl is confidence.
epg
> Yeah, you can quote me.

> Don't be mad when we hold the door open.

> Take Advantage of the mood im in.

> LET US PAY FOR YOU! DON'T 'FEEL BAD'

> We enjoy doing it.

> It's expected.

> Smile and say 'thank you.'

> Kiss us when no one's watching.

> If you kiss us when you know somebody's looking, we'll be more impressed.

> You don't have to get dressed up for us.

> If we're going out with you in the first place, you don't have to feel the

> need to wear the shortest skirt you have or put on every kind of makeup you own.

> We like you for WHO you are and not WHAT you are.

> Honestly, i think a girl looks more beautiful when she's just in her pj's.

> Or my t-shirt and boxers, not all dolled up.

> Don't take everything we say seriously.

> Sarcasm is a beautiful thing.

> See the beauty in it.

> Don't get angry easily.

> Stop using magazines/media as your bible.

> Don't talk about how hott Morris Chesnutt, Brad Pitt, or Jesse McCartney is in front of us.

> It's boring, and we don't care.

> You have girlfriends for that.

> Whatever happened to the word 'handsome'/'beautiful'.

> I'd be utterly stunned by a girl who greeted me with 'Hey handsome!' instead of 'Hey baby/ stud/ cutie/ sexy' or whatever else you can think of.

> On the other hand im not sayin i wouldn't like it ether.

> Girls: I cannot stress this enough: IF YOU AREN'T BEING TREATED RIGHT BY A GUY, DON'T WAIT FOR HIM TO CHANGE.> DITCH HIS SORRY DISGRACE-TO-THE-MALE-POPULATION ASS,> AND FIND SOMEONE WHO WILL TREAT YOU WITH UTTER RESPECT

> Someone who will honor your morals.

> Someone who will make you smile when you're at your lowest.

> Someone who will care for you even when you make mistakes.

> Someone who will love you, no matter how bad you make them feel.

> Someone who will stop what theyre doing just to look you in the eyes....and say 'i love you' ..........AND ACTUALLY MEAN IT!
epg
> *****Give the nice guys a chance*****

> Holdin Hands- Girls : If you want to hold his hand, gently bump into it a couple of times.
> Guys : Grab it if it happens more than once.

> Cuddling- Girls : When you want to cuddle with him, tell him you're cold.
> Guys : Automatically move closer to her.

> Movies- Girls : During a movie, if he puts his arm around you, tilt your head on his shoulder
> Guys : Lift her chin up and kiss her.

> Loving each other- Guys : When she tells you she loves you, look deep into her eyes, give her a peck on the lips, and tell her you love her too... And mean it.

> Laying below the stars- Girls : When you're both laying under the stars, put your head on his chest and close your eyes as you listen to his steady heart beat
> Guys : Whisper in her ear and link your hands with hers. Now m

The ICC in conjunction with Cricket Australia have today released a standard code of conduct for Backyard Cricket.

1. GENERAL RULES
1a. Can't Get Out First Ball: Curious rule introduced to give the token unco dickhead a reprieve. Smart-arse batsmen use it to hone their reverse sweep; which becomes interesting when smart-arse bowlers use it to hone their beamer.

1b. Caught Behind (auto wikky): Since no one has the desire or the reflexes to stand in the slips cordon, an edge onto the back fence constitutes instant dismissal. Has signalled the death of the late cut.

1c. One Hand, One Bounce: This popular innovation (When a fielder can dismiss a batsman by catching the ball in one hand on the first bounce) is essential to the very fabric of the sport. Importantly, it means a game can be organised with a minimum of players. Note that this rule only applies when the fielder is holding a beer in their other hand.

1d. No LBW: When no umpires are available (or trustworthy), the only option is to can the LBW rule altogether, ensuring cagey batsmen shuffle across the crease as is test driving a Zimmer frame.

1e. Six And Out (Then Fetch It): Introduced to combat space and energy restrictions. It's rumoured to have been initiated by a hapless bowler living alongside a pack of Rottweilers.

1f. Standard Over: All veteran backyard bowlers know that the standard length of an over in backyard cricket ranges from anything between 10-12 balls. You only relinquish the bowling duties when questioned by any fielders or opposing team members. But only after the standard response of "Two to Come"

2. ESSENTIAL ITEMS
2a. Esky: Strategically placed at the bowler's end, the esky is the shrine, the fuel, the Richie Benaud of backyard cricket - because it holds the beer.

2b. Balls: A minimum of 3 tennis balls is advised, as there's always some smart-arse who delights in tonking them over the fence (see rule 1e). Advanced exponents use electrical tape around half the ball to give it more swing than Austin Powers.

2c. Dog: Preferable of Kelpie or Heeler extraction, so it can field every ball, including those that disappear under the house or thorny bushes. The downside is that they produce more slobber than a 14 year old male Penthouse reader. The upside is the dog will sleep for 3 days straight afterwards.

2d. Rubbish Bin: It would be nice to think you can clean up your own mess, but in reality the bin makes a perfect set of stumps.

2e. Bat: Boasting multiple scratches and dents, and no grip left on the handle, it's usually of 1980's vintage with a single scoop, with a fake signature of Allan Border or Merv Hughes providing added backyard cult status.

3. CODE OF ETHICS
3a.i) Stumps: The game draws to a close when, Your host finally cooks the snags after the barbie has run
out of gas,
ii) Macca hits the last ball onto the road and it disappears down the drain (not withstanding rules 1e and 2c),
iii) You can't get that batsman out with any type of bowling pace or spin, or
iv) Your girlfriend cracks the shits and wants to go home because you "become a shit" when you hang around with your mates.

3b. Flower Damage: Any respectful male will cringe and help hide the fact that you have just topped your girlfriend's petunias. Somehow, the universal threat of a week-long drought bonds the male species.

3c. Spilt Beer: Ideally, the offending batsman should apologise profusely and offer to replace the vanquished stubbie. Fat Chance. The feat prompts shitloads of laughter, and the usually triumphant "Get me one while you're at it!"

3d. No Running Between Wickets: Every backyard cricket specialist should know this phrase, "The words fun and run don't go together." Just ask Arjuna Ranatunga. Besides, how the hell are you supposed to run in thongs?

3e. Courtesy Call: Always invite the chicks to have a bat. They usually say no, but on the odd occasion, they do take a grip of the willow. You can bowl a couple of dollies t