"Nobody in Rugby should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein." - Jono Gibbs - Chiefs

"I'm going to graduate on time, no matter how long it takes." - Rodney So'ialo - Hurricanes - on University

"You guys line up alphabetically by height." and "You guys pair up in groups of three, then line up in a circle." - Colin Cooper - Hurricanes head coach

Chris Masoe (Hurricanes) on whether he had visited the Pyramids during his visit to Egypt : "I can't really remember the names of the clubs that we went to."

"He's a guy who gets up at six o'clock in the morning regardless of what time it is." - Colin Cooper on Paul Tito

Kevin Senio (Auckland ), on Night Rugby vs Day Games "It's basically the same, just darker."

David Nosafora ( Auckland) talking about Troy Flavell "I told him, 'Son, what is it with you. Is it ignorance or apathy?' He said, 'David, I don't know and I don't care.'

David Holwell (Hurricanes) when asked about the upcoming season: "I want to reach for 150 or 200 points this season, whichever comes first."

"Andy Ellis - the 21 year old, who turned 22 a few weeks ago"(Murray Mexted)

"Colin has done a bit of mental arithmetic with a calculator." (Ma Nonu)

"He scored that try after only 22 seconds - totally against the run of play." (Murray Mexted)

"We actually got the winning try three minutes from the end but then they scored." (Phil Waugh Warratah)

"I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body." (Jerry Collins)

"That kick was absolutely unique, except for the one before it which was identical." (Tony Brown)

"I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father." (Tana Umaga)

"Sure there have been injuries and deaths in rugby - but none of them serious." (Doc Mayhew)

"If history repeats itself, I should think we can expect the same thing again."(Anton Oliver)

"I would not say he (Rico Gear) is the best left winger in the Super 14, but there are none better." ( Murray Mexted)

"I never comment on referees and I'm not going to break the habit of a lifetime for that prat." (Ewan McKenzie)

Murray Deaker: "Have you ever thought of writing your autobiography?"
Tana Umaga: "On what ?"

"Well, either side could win it, or it could be a draw."(Murray Mexted)

"Strangely, in slow motion replay, the ball seemed to hang in the air for even longer."( Murray Mexted)

A girl walks into a supermarket and buys the following items:

1 Bar of Soap
1 Toothbrush
1 Tube of toothpaste
1 loaf of bread
1 pint of milk
1 apple
1 banana
1 orange
1 plum
1 grapefruit
1 tomato
1 lettuce
1 cabbage
1 baking potato
1 kraft single
1 samosa
1 vegetable pakora
1 muesli bar
1 pie
1 frozen pizza
1 single frozen dinner

The bloke behind her in the queue taps her on the shoulder. He is carrying a basket with a six pack of Stella, a pizza and some Wagon Wheels.

As she turns he smiles at her and says, "Single, eh?"
The girl smiles sheepishly and replies,"How did you guess?"

He looks at her - straight in the eyes and gently says...

"Because you're minging."