I knew a blonde that was so stupid that.......

* she called me to get my phone number.

* she spent 20 minutes looking at the orange juice box because it said "concentrate."

* she put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to make up her mind.

*she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order.

*she sent me a fax with a stamp on it.

*she tried to drown a fish.

*she thought a quarterback was a refund.

*she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death.

*she tripped over a cordless phone.

*she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.

*she asked for a price check at the Dollar Store.

*she studied for a blood test.

*she thought Meow Mix was a CD for cats.

*when she heard that 90% of all crimes occur around the home, she moved.

*when she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 bus twice instead.

*when she took you to the airport and saw a sign that said "Airport Left" she turned around and went home

1. Why does your gynaecologist leave the room when you
get undressed?

2. If a person owns a piece of land do they own it all
the way
down to the core of the earth

3. Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth
closed?

4. Is it possible to brush your teeth without wiggling
your backside

5. Why is it called Alcoholics Anonymous when the first
thing you do is
stand up and say, 'My name is Bob, and I am an
alcoholic'?

6. Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the
freezer?

7. Why does mineral water that 'has trickled through
mountains for
centuries' have a 'use by' date?

8. Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the
toast to a
horrible crisp no one would eat?

9. Is French kissing in France just called kissing?

10. Who was the first person to look at a cow and
say, 'I think I'll
squeeze these dangly things here and drink whatever
comes out'?

11. What do people in China call their good plates?

12. Why do people point to their wrist when asking for
the time, but
don't point to their crotch when they ask where the
bathroom?

13. Why is a person that handles your money called
a 'Broker'?

14. If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

15. Why is it that when someone tells you that there
are over billion
stars in the universe, you believe them, but if they
tell you there is
wet paint somewhere, you have to touch it to make sure?

16. Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's
face, he gets mad
at you but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks
his head out of
the window?

ENGLISH ......................CHINESE

1) That’s not right.........Sum Ting Wong

2) Are you harboring a fugitive............Hu Yu Hai Ding

3) See me ASAP...............Kum Hia Nao

4) Stupid Man.........................Dum Fuk

5) Small horse....................Tai Ni Po Ni

6) Did you go to the beach?.................Wai Yu So Tan

7) I bumped in to a coffee table...........Ai Bang Mai Fa Kin Ni

I think you need a face lift...............Chin Tu Fat

9) Its very dark in here....................Wao So Dim

10) I thought you were on a diet...........Wai Yu Mun Ching

11) This is a tow away zone................No Pah King

12) Staying out of sight................Lei Ying Lo

13) He's cleaning his automobile..............Wa Shing Kah

14) Your body odor is offensive...............Yu Stin Ki Pu

15) Great...................Fa Kin Su Pah

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