questions that need to be answered...

why is abbreiviation such a long word?
why do ytou never get good news out of an enveope wth a window?
why didnt noah swot the flies?
if you've used up all your sick days is it alrite to call in dea?
if one synchronised swimmer drowns.. do the rest have to drown too?
what if there was a lightening flash and it staye don?
can an amateur footballer do proffesional fouls?
why do they make toasters with a setting that burns the ttoast?
if crystals have healing powers, why are they so hard to swallow?
why doesnt the guy who does the tour-de-france do a lap of honour?
why do world heavyweight boxing champions have bodyguards?

general advice...

dont under any circumstance put your head in anything that has HEAD REMOVER written on it!
dont head out to sea on a windsurfer until youve learned how to turn round!
dont ever think a cheap second hand parachute with a sign on it saying 'ONLY USED ONCE' is a bargain
avoid using the phrase 'i dont think youve got the nerve to pull that trigger' when someone is pointing a gun at you
if you lend someone a fiver and never see them again it was worht it
if someone steals your car get there registration number
always get married in the morning that way if it doesnt work out you havnt ruined the whole day.
if you want to find out whether someone is stuoppid or not tell them that a light yeasr is a year that has 40 per cent less calories then a regular year. if they say 'really' there stupid!
ALWAYS REMEBER MOST KINDS OF TROUBLE START OFF AS FUN
at a party dont hide in a fridge for a laugh!
NEVER SHAKE AN IGUANA!!!

-reply to everything someone says with 'thats what you think.'
-write 'X equals buried treasure'all over someone's road maps
-finish everything you say with the words 'in accordance with the prophecy'
-always pay for everything in 5 pence pieces
-if you know any fitness freaks tell them everytime you see them that they look ill and tired
-stand on the pavement and point a hair-dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down
-if someone dials the wrong number and calls you by mystake have a long and involved discussion with the caller about the person they ask for, saying how worried you are about their "little problem" and how you hope you can keep the police out of iy. if the caller thinks your a resturnat and wants to order a takeaway, take the order.
-go to a resturant and order a rare steak when it arives send it bak and ask them to cook it just a little more, do this about thirteen times until finally you demand to see the manager and ask how on earth he expects you to eat such an inedible lump of charcoal.
-anytime anyone soughs however so slightly grab hem and insist tou perforn the heimlich manoeuvre for at least 5 minutes no matter how much they protest.
-if you no someone who goes non and on about the homeless and how they should pull themselves together and get themselves jobs, simply burn his house down.
-stand by a zebra crossing and everytime a car stops walk off
-lend a neighbour your lawn mower then two weeks after they have returned it ask for it back repeatedly if they see you useing it insist that u ent them the spare one and keep demanding its return
-if someone you know greets you in the street pretend not to know them and threaten to call the police if they dont leave you alone
-buy one of those watches with a built in tv remote control go round to your friends houses during the cup final and change channels everytime it look slike someones about to score
-everytime someone bends over near you, blow a rasberry

01] I _____ beth.

02] beth is _____.

03] If I were alone in a room with beth, I would _____.

04] I think beth should _____.

05]beth needs _____.

06] I want to _____ beth.

07] Someday beth will ___.

08] beth reminds me of _____.

09] Without beth _____.

10] My memories of beth are _____.

11] beth can be _____.

12] The Worst thing about beth is _____.

13] The best thing about beth is _____.

14] I am _____ with beth.

15] One thing i would like to know about beth is _____.

16] beth should go and _____.

17] beth _____ me.

18] beth is my _______.