1. Mr. T speaks only when necessary. His main form of communication is
folding his arms and slowly shaking his head. And regardless of the
situation, he is always understood.

2. Mr. T's pity for fools is used by mathematicians as a demonstration
of the concept of infinity.

3. There are only four horsemen of the apocalypse, because Mr. T is
going to f#cking walk.

4. You have only seen Mr. T in human form. In Narnia, he is a T. Rex
with a lion's tail hanging out of his mouth.

5. Why does Mr. T wear still have his mohawk? Cause his reflection
pities the fool who don't!

6. Mr. T invented fools. Realizing the magnitude of his folly, he then
created Pity.

7. Mr. T's sp3rm is so strong it could impregnate a man.

8. 23. That's the number of people Mr. T has pitied in the time it has
taken you to read this sentence.

9. Mr. T is allergic to doorknobs. That's why he can only kick through
doors.

10. Behind every great man, there is a great woman. Behind that woman is
Mr. T.

11. Mr. T's edition of the VH1 show 'Where Are They Now' was the
shortest in the show's history. It was 10 seconds long, and consisted of
a black screen with the words "Right Behind You" written on it.

12. Mr. T once pitied the sun. An ice age followed.

13. In 1972 a crack commando unit was sent to prison by a military court
for a crime they didn't commit. These men promptly escaped a maximum
security stockade to the Los Angeles underground. Today, still wanted by
the government they survived ad soldiers of fortune, until Mr. T found
them and beat them to death with his bare hands.

14. Mr. T is not black. It's just that the sun is to afraid to shine on
him.

15. Mr. T was fired from the Psychic Friends Network for always
predicting pain.

16. Every time Mr. T pities the fool, a pornstar regains her virginity.
Then proceeds to lose it to Mr. T.

17. Before Mr. T, the alphabet only had 25 letters.

18. Mr. T remains the only bad @ss in American history to sucessfully
fire 15,000 rounds out of a gun and hit no one.

19. Despite popular belief, if there is a fool in the woods, and nobody
is around to hear his jibba jabba, Mr. T is still able to pity him.

20. The last time Mr. T went to McDonald's, Ronald McDonald greeted him.
What occured next proved to be the most violent beating of a clown ever
recorded in human history.

21. Mr. T's incredible greatness has been attributed to the fact that
his genetic code doesn't have any A, G, or C. His genetic code is in
fact, nothing but T's.

22. The glorious, blinding dazzle of Mr. T's gold chains can cure
Alzheimer's Disease. Unfortunately, the glorious, blinding dazzle of his
biceps causes it.

23. A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush. A bird in the hand of
Mr.T is a deadly weapon in 17 states.

24. There are now over 43 fools born every minute in order to keep up
with the rate at which Mr. T pities them.

25. Mr. T made his van go twice the speed of light because he wanted to
prove that quantum physics was a bunch of jibba jabba.

26. Revolving doors were invented to keep Mr. T from kicking them in all
the time.

27. Originally the A-Team was named T-Team and consisted of Mr. T and
six of his genetically engineered clones driving around in a van made of
pure gold. Producers changed the format after every criminal known to
man was killed in the pilot episode.

28. Mr. T took Mother Nature from behind. We refer to the event as the
Big Bang.

29. Mr. T is not really black, film is just too scared of him to fully
expose itself.

30. Mr. T obtained a diploma from established post-secondary institution
Harvard University. All he did was stand in front of a school building
with his arms crossed and nodded.

Mr T aint no Fool!!
At the end of every rainbow is Mr. T. It is another way for Mr. T to pity fools.
Everyone knows Mr. T ate the leprechaun.

On the 0th day, Mr. T created God. Then made God do the rest of the work
while Mr. T pitied him.

Mr. T uses E before I as he pleases

The last time Mr. T and Chuck Norris teamed up, Atlantis sunk.

When Mr. T was 18-months old he ended World War II. He simply folded his
arms, shook his head, and the entire Nazi Armies stopped at once. When Hitler
tried to protest Mr T. killed him, took all the country's Gold, and fashioned it
into chains for all to see. Sources say that Hitler was the first pitied fool.

Mr. T is very superstitious. Because of this, he tears off the head of any black
cat that crosses his path. In fact, he tears off the head of just about any
animal
that crosses his path. Mr. T can never be too careful.

One night Mr. T took a 10 p.m. train home. He still refuses to give it back.

After Jesus turned water into wine, Mr. T turned that wine into blood and
disappeared in a cloud of smoke. When the smoke settled all that remained was
a giant wooden "T" and Jesus knew he was in trouble.

Mr. T walked in front of a speeding bus. Needless to say, he was charged with 7
counts of manslaughter

Mr. T destroyed the periodic table, saying Mr. T. only recognizes the element of
surprise.

Mr. T is hung like a 8 year old. No, seriously... his penis is the size of a small boy.

Before Mr.T was born there were only 25 letters in the alphabet.

I was going to make a Random Mr. T Fact, but he pitied me into not doing it.

The last person who looked at Mr. T was Ray Charles.

Some believe that Mr. T. is unintelligent because he uses what we believe to be made up words like jibba jabba. However those words are the answers to the most complicated mathematical problems in the universe. Mr. T. has known this his entire life and does not tell anyone because ones brain would implode if you tried to comprehend the question. Mr. T. pities those who try

The punishment for manslaughter in El Salvador is 35 years of Mr. T's pity without parole

Mr. T does not have dinner parties. The one and only dinner party he had he served mohawks of fury and double fists of pain.

When asked for his thoughts on vegetarians, Mr. T said: "If god didn't want us to eat animals he wouldn't have made them out of meat…Fool

Mr. T once entered a Hot Dog eating contest. He ate a record 93 hot dogs, a 72 oz. steak, two pedestrians, a streetlamp, and a judge who called him "that guy from the A- Team".

Contrary to popular belief, it wasn't the planes that killed King Kong, nor beauty, but instead the fear of being pitied by Mr. T

During the first season of American Gladiators, 24 contestants died while attempting to run the Eliminator. The Eliminator was a cardboard cutout of Mr. T.

Mr. T is slated to star in the hit show formerly known as "Everybody Loves Raymond," which was changed to "Everyone Tolerates Raymond" last season and will now become "Mr. T Pities Raymond