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- Me, Myself, and I
- wat ru doing 2nite?
guess wat im dn...?
DRINKY DRINKY FALLY DOWNY...
- Jay-Z (Definitly da best rapper ever) Eminem, Kanye, Notorious Big, Dmx and msot sorts of rap really. Recently hegs been trying to educate me and teach me to like good music so the Artic Monkeys and da Killers are class 2. Cant beat those Irish drinking tunes either great 4 an old session, cheers to heg for all those cds so i actually know some of the words now Cant forget Justin hes some talented bastard like.
- Scarface, The Godfather, Goodfella's, Casino, Baseketball, Sleepers, Tommy Tiernan(da 1st 1) and u cant beat Family Guy, da Simpsons or Scrubs
- Manchester United. Basically Roy Keane is the biggest legend of all time. Hate chelsea big time, fucking rich bastards. Well fucking hammer ye next season. Rooney's a genius. Looks like we r in with a serious shout of a treble this yr come on to fuck. Vidic come on will ya ur badly needed back in the team. John O Sheas a liability even when hes on the bench
- Scared Of
- Cominig home from America early to repeat exams., Sickening
- Happiest When
- Still in America in mid August and watching United play some good football. Its actaull happening this season. Out with the boys having a few beers, talking shite and acting the bolux in general
- 'Alcohol the cause of and solution to all of life's problems'(Homer Simpson)
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- How well do you know Killian? 34 Taken
'My husband does engineering in college' - Surprising but hilarious quote from Killian Mc Bride
'Sure to get fat man tits u have to be a fat man' - Fair enough Frank fair enough
'Fuck, is that da shades ? oh its alrite thats not even people '- Bob
'Do u really have teeth in ur ass ?' - Bob again, I cant even explain this one.
'Oh thats not a cabbie thats kill, brilliant' - Cyril when he woke up after we arrived at his house. After i drove him to town, was with him all nite and collected him in town again. Mouldnyness haha.
'When discussing the Chinese and Indian market, for simplicity lets call it the 'Chindian market' Priceless gem from Eddie Hobbs
'Fucking hell uv to go to hospital 9 days a week, thats gonna be well hard' - Brilliant from Denis Ward
'The sperm left over after sex goes up thru the whole body and becomes breast milk ' if u say so bob
'What would happen if Mr. Hanky the xmas poo had diarrohia babies' Bob again cant even begin to explain
'If a woman gave birth to a really hairy baby would she get carpet burn' Guess who ?
'Oh Mexico thats near Texaco isn't it' Jen had me in stitches in the library with that one
'Puking makes me vomit ?'
Robyn Sheehan stunningly clever remark. Actually i reckon if u saw the condition of her its probably a forgivable comment. She couldnt move for three days
'Are u Bosnian ?'(American wanker) 'No i'm Irish'(Mike) 'Oh rite sure it was one or the other wasn't it ?'
American dickhead dat confused bosnia with ireland. Yes americans r dat slow
1 Comment 335 weeks
Who are you?
2. Are we friends?
3. When and How did we meet?
4. Do you have a crush on me?
5. Have you ever wanted to punch me?
6. Give me a nickname and explain why?
7. Describe me in 1 word...
8. What was your first impression of me?
9. Do u still think the same?
10. What reminds you of me?
11. If you could give me anything what would it be?
12. How well do you know me?
13. When was the last time you saw me?
14. Ever wanted to tell me something that you couldn't?
15. Are you going to put this on your blog and see what I say about you?
16 WOULD U FUCK ME?
17 IF U HAD ME FOR A HALF AN HOUR WHAT WOULD U DO?
6 Comments 369 weeks
I LOVE This Song!
= I KNOW This Song!
Dude, all the chicks at this party are ugly
= Dude, none of the chicks at this party will talk to me.
Man, I’m hungry
= Man, if I don’t eat right now I am going to be puking all over this bar…again.
You’re really pretty
= I’m going to be really ashamed of it tomorrow but tonight is all about instant gratification, honey.
Want to watch a movie?
= Want to come over to my room for some extremely creepy back rubbing and some equally disturbing neck-nibbling?
I’m soooooooo drunk (said by a girl)
= I’m planting a seed in your head that will eventually grow into a beautiful tree which excuses me from blame for my actions tonight.
= I'm sooooooooo horny
I just, like, want to help animals, ya know?
= I just, like, want to get in your pants, ya know?
You’re my best friend... man!
= You’re my only friend in arm’s reach right now and I need someone to pay for this shot, man.
I don’t want to ruin the friendship
= You’re a nice girl but you’re very heavy and I’d rather pretend I value our friendship than spend tomorrow dreaming up ways to kill myself.
This is the BEST night of my LIFE!
= This is the BEST night of my WEEKEND!
Let’s take a walk, this bar is crowded
= I prefer my handjobs outdoors.
I’m totally fine
= I’m totally going to be needing a toilet or bucket in about five minutes
What’s up, Bro?
= What’s up, guy-who’s-name-I-can’t-ever-remember?
Who wants to dance?
= Who wants to watch me stumble around the party, waving my arms, spilling my drink and pile-driving my genitals into anything wearing a skirt?
Hey, did you get the notes from Bio?
= Hey, I’m going to ask you about class because I’m too scared to ask you out.
I had, like, ten beers before I even came out
= I'm, like, the kind of guy that lies about how much I drink.
So whose round is it?
= PLEASE DON'T BE MINE PLEASE DON'T BE MINE PLEASE DON'T BE MINE
= I'm out of money and need someone to buy me drink
I can't believe you're drunk already!
= I've been milking a Miller Lite all night while you've been downing Whiskey Sours.
C'mon, she has nice big tits
= She may well indeed be horrendously fat and I'll take a lot of shit for this tomorrow but I'm going to make petty justifications to satisfy my lust monkey.
Man, check her out.
= I'm way too intoxicated to tell if she's attractive or if she's a three-toed sloth. Your reaction should be helpful in deciding which she is.
She has pretty eyes.
= See "She has big tits"
I'm just too tired.
= Yes... I have whiskey dick (or "brewer's droop" depending on what side of the Atlantic ur from)
This place is shit. Let's go
= I have tried for 45 minutes and can not find a woman I want to have sex with.
= I got shot down by a couple girls over there and want to leave before they tell every woman in here about my half assed drunken attempts.
You have beautiful eyes
= (And an ugly face)
The crowd was really bad
= I was the best looking person there
The crowd was really snobby.
= I was the ugliest person there
Yeah, all bouncers suck.
= I'm too ugly/drunk/both to get in anywhere
that girl is totally eyeing me
= she glanced and looked away in revulsion
dude, this girl was totally in to me
= she gave me a fake name and left
That fat chick is kinda cute...
= Take my keys away immediately; I am in no condition to be driving tonight.
What are you drinking?
= There is no more beer left. Make me one of those.
This is my beer
= This is really your beer but since you don't remember and this one is more full I'm going to take it.
= You're out for a night of drinking when someone calls out "Hey, let's go to (insert place here)!" You blink your eyes once only to realize that you are at said location, with no memory of how you got there, who came with you, or how you got in.
I have to g
1 Comment 373 weeks