DO THIS FOR THE CRAIC

Leave one memory of us together...... It doesn't matter if I know you a little or a lot, anything you remember. Next, repost this bulletin on your own blog and see how many people leave a memory about you...

Section I - General Rules

1) The first person to yell "SHOTGUN" gets to ride in the front seat.

2) The remaining back seats may be divvied up in the same manner by being the first to call "back right seat", etc..

3) The word "shotgun" must be loud enough to be heard by at least one witness. If no witness is to be found, or in case of a tie, the driver has the final word. After all, it is most likely her car. (note: if it isn't his car, and the owner is present, the owner's decision is final. Owner must be sober, however, or she will defer her judgment to the driver.)

4) Early calls are strictly prohibited. All occupants of the vehicle (including the driver) must be outside of the building and directly on the way to the vehicle before shotgun may be called. Under no circumstances may a person call shotgun inside a building. For sake of simplicity, a garage is considered to be outside. Parking structures and detached garages are always considered as being outdoors, even if they are underground.

5) A person may only call shotgun for one way of a trip. Shotgun can never be called while inside a vehicle or still technically on the way to the first location. For example, one can not get out of a vehicle and call Shotgun for the return journey.

6) although men and women are equal.....women always get shotgun.end of.

7) One is allowed to ride shotgun as many times as she can call it, but for herself only. No one can call shotgun for their slower friend, unless the friend has a speech or mental handicap that prevents them from calling it for themselves.

The driver has final say in all ties and disputes. The driver has the right to suspend or remove all shotgun privileges from one or more persons.

Section II - Special Cases

These special exceptions to the rules above should be considered in the order presented; the case listed first will take precedence over any of the cases beneath it, when applicable.

1) In the instance that the normal driver of a vehicle is locked or otherwise unable to perform their duties as driver, then he/she is automatically given Shotgun.

2) If the instance that the person who actually owns the vehicle is not driving, then he/she is automatically given Shotgun, unless they decline.

3) In the instance the driver's spouse, lover, partner, or hired prostitute for the evening is going to accompany the group, he/she is automatically given Shotgun, unless they decline.

4) In the instance that one of the passengers may become so ill during the course of the journey that the other occupants feel he/she will peauk their ring, then the ill person should be given Shotgun to make appropriate use of the window.

5) In the instance that only one person knows how to get to a given location and this person is not the driver, then as the designated navigator for the group they automatically get Shotgun, unless they decline.

6) In the instance that one of the occupants is too wide or tall to fit comfortably in the back seat, then the driver may show mercy and award Shotgun to the genetic misfit. Alternatively, the driver and other passengers may continually rip the piss out of them as they make a three hour trip with him crammed in the back.

Section III - The Survival Of The Fittest Rules (a.k.a The Bastard Rules)

1) If the driver so wishes, he/she may institute the Survival Of The Fittest Rules on the process of calling Shotgun. In this case all rules, excepting 1.8, are suspended and the passenger seat is occupied by whoever can take it by force.

2) The driver must announce the institution of the Survival Of The Fittest Rules with reasonable warning to all passengers. This clause reduces the amount of blood lost by passengers and the damage done to the vehicle.

3) Please follow the above rules to the best of your ability. If there are any arguments or exceptions not covered in these rules, please refer to rule 1.8.

Section IV - Revisions<

In case you needed further proof that the world has gone potty, here are
some actual label instructions on consumer goods.

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) -- "Do not turn upside
down.
(well...duh, a bit late, huh!)

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On Sainsbury's peanuts -- "Warning: contains nuts."
(talk about a news flash)

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On Boot's Children Cough Medicine -- "Do not drive a car or operate
machinery after taking this medication."
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we
could just get those 5 year-olds with head-colds off those bulldozers.)

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On Marks &Spencer Bread Pudding -- "Product will be hot after heating."
(...and you thought????...)

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On a Sears hairdryer -- Do not use while sleeping.
(That's the only time I have to work on my hair.)

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On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner! No purchase necessary.
Details inside. (the shoplifter special?)

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On a bar of Dial soap -- "Directions: Use like regular soap."
(and that would be???....)

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On some Swanson frozen dinners -- "Serving suggestion: Defrost."
(but, it's just a suggestion.)

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On packaging for a Rowenta iron -- "Do not iron clothes on body."
(but wouldn't this save me time?)

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On Nytol Sleep Aid -- "Warning: May cause drowsiness."
(..I'm taking this because???....)

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On most brands of Christmas lights -- "For indoor or outdoor use only."
(as opposed to what?)

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On a Japanese food processor -- "Not to be used for the other use."
(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)

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On an American Airlines packet of nuts -- "Instructions: Open packet, eat
nuts." (Step 3: say what?)

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On a child's Superman costume -- "Wearing of this garment does not enable
you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this
one.)

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On a Swedish chainsaw -- "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or
genitals." (Oh my God..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)