okay, i havent been on in ever... i still wont be though, but anyway things suck, single life is weird, and im told im lucky to be alive, and i've been almost passing out tonight, and i dunno whats going on. ok so me and kym broke up about a month ago, which means it was prolly about 2 weeks ago. oh ya, and the lucky ot be alive thing, i was airing up my tire and it wasnt up to pressure yet and it blew out in my face, and normally when a tire blows itll tear apart adn send pieces flying everywhere with metal wire everywhere to cut stuff up, after the tire blew i found out i also had two nails in my tire right around where the tire blew from, and those should have gone flying too, but all that happened was the tire blew through a small hole in the side wall, and i think the location is all that kept it from injuring me severely, then passing out tonight is becuase of me trying to learn how to swim, and now i can finally doggy-paddle if i have to. i need another girlfriend, but everyone i want is taken, sept maybe one. anyway, more maybe later if i care.

hmm, well, lets see.... i need to fucken open up, ... yah, things would be better, more fun, all around better... umm, lets see, i still think breanna's being a stupid bitch usen chris to try and make me jealous, i have a plan to make it backfire, but im not sure i want to... becuase then it would seem like i was jealous even though i just hate seeing him be drug around by her... it looks terrible, shes just always got to be hanging on him or touching him or something, i mean, yah, you gotta love your b/gf, but let them fucken breath... and the shit that really bugs me is that when ever im around she has to make sure shes hanging off of him and looks strait at me to see if i notice... its stupid shit...o, lets see, i fucked up my hand, its been a while since ive done that... bruised almost my entire palm...ill see if i can do weights tomorrow...ummm, shit, lets see, what else has been goen on?... things with kym are great, love my life for once... been busy as hell, been tired as hell, still am, i need lots of sleep, but dont have the time to get it.... gotta work tomorrow and saturday...scholar's bowl sucks, or i suck, i dunno which, im just dumb... i have an extremely low self esteem/ outlook on life... sometimes i just want hit by a car... lets see, parents think that since i have a job using up all my time, i need more stuff to do, so telling me to do more shit, while they do less... bullshit.. then i want to quit 4-h but they wont let me becuase their fucken assholes.... man.... i hate bitchen like this on here, but its the only real place where i can say what i want to... i wish i had more people to talk to in person, cus when i dont im trying to pass out... makes doing drugs look nice, cus then those people can pass out, i can't they all suck.. i hate them all...im behind in almost every class now, i have no idea what im doing in school adn yet everyone thinks i know more than anyone else, i hate it... but ofcourse its my fault, .. so i hate myself, which is what i usually come to conclude, that im stupid and hate myself, o well, ttyl possibly

holy shit its been long, i should write sumthen... but im tired and its late, so umm, wow, i have a girlfriend, kym musser, shes great, and.. i have a job at dyers, its ok there, but they dont pay you much...bastards.... but yah, thats the big things in my life, and thers no pun there with kym, shes not fat, and shes beutiful...that all i really have to say for now, besides i plan to write sometime again within the month.. if i dont, mail me a note saying your pissed off at me and i might, later days...