Bebo 
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Male,
101
- from D haise in Cavan (Ballyhaise are on the piss again and so on........)
- Profile views: 8,009
- Member since: January 2006
- Last active: 10/4/11
- www.bebo.com/ckevoneill
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- Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.
- Me, Myself, and I
- Once upon a time there was a Bear and a Bee who lived in a wood and were the best of friends. All summer long the Bee collected nectar from morning to night while the Bear lay on his back basking in the long grass. When winter came the Bear realised he had nothing to eat and thought to himself "I hope that busy little Bee will share some of his honey with me". But the Bee was nowhere to be found because he had died of a stress induced coronary disease.
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Danielle Wilson Higgins
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My CV
My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned because I couldn't concentrate.
Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe.
After that I tried to be a tailor, but I just wasn't suited for it.
The job was only so-so anyhow.
Next I tried working in a muffler factory, but that was exhausting.
I wanted to be a barber, but I just couldn't cut it.
I attempted to be a deli worker, but any way I sliced it, I couldn't cut the mustard.
My best job was being a musician, but eventually I found I wasn't note worthy.
I studied a long time to become a doctor, but I didn't have any patience.
Next was a job in a shoe factory; I tried, but I just didn't fit in.
I became a professional fisherman, but discovered that I couldn't live on my net income.
I thought about becoming a witch, so I tried that for a spell.
I managed to get a good job working for a pool maintenance company, but the work was just too draining.
My last job was working at Starbucks, but I had to quit, because it was always the same old grind.
After many years of trying to find steady work, I finally got a job as a historian, until I realized there was no future in it.
0 Comments 334 weeks
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Tasteless jokes
What does a woman do after she returns from the battered women's shelter?
Ans: The dishes if she knows what's good for her.
What do 15,582 battered women have in common?
Ans: They don't know when to shut up.
What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?
Ans: Nothing since you've already told her twice.
A black, a Puerto Rican, and a Mexican guy were all riding together in a car. So who's driving?
Ans: The policeman.
What's the best thing about a blow job from an Ethiopian woman?
Ans: You know she'll swallow.
How do you piss off a female archeologist?
Ans: Give her a used tampon & ask her what period it comes from.
Why aren't there any Puerto Ricans on Star Trek?
Ans: Because they're not going to work in the future, either.
If your wife keeps coming out of the kitchen to nag you, what have you done wrong?
Ans: Made her chain too long.
What is the hardest part about eating vegetables?
Ans: The wheelchairs.
Why did Hitler commit suicide?
Ans: He got his gas bill.
Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza?
Ans: A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.
How do you kill a thousand flies at once?
Ans: Smack an Ethiopian in the face with a frying pan.
0 Comments 381 weeks
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Funny Quotes
Time is never wasted when you're wasted all the time.
-- Catherine Zandonella
When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
-- Henry Youngman
Yes, madam, I am drunk. But in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly.
-- Winston Churchill (replying to Lady Astor's comment 'Sir, you're drunk!')
Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.
-- Ernest Hemingway
We were so poor my daddy unplugged the clocks when we went to bed.
-- Chris Rock
"You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on."
-- Joe E Lewis.
"People who drink light "beer" don't like the taste of beer; they just like to pee a lot."
-- Capital Brewery, Middleton, WI.
"I drink to make other people interesting."
-- George Jean Nathan.
"An alcoholic is anyone you don't like who drinks more than you do."
-- Dylan Thomas.
"My dad was the town drunk. Most of the time that's not so bad; but New York City?"
-- Henry Youngman
"I'd rather have a full bottle in front of me than a full frontal labotomy."
-- Fred Allen.
"I don't like people who take drugs... Customs men for example."
-- Mick Miller.0 Comments 386 weeks
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5/26/09
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5/12/09
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4/15/09
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Fergal Mc Goldrick3/11/09
what story for paddys?
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3/6/09
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Roisin Lyng2/5/09hey kevin, think helen has already extended an invitation to yourself on behalf but just in case party in our new house in dub sat nite if your around!
- 2/5/09 via Mobile
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Sharon2/3/09
If ur near rte two ders a ting on the busby's babes on it!!
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Pól Mac An Phríora2/3/09yea,came back up sunday afternoon,was fucked after sat nite!!have gthis week off just,not much
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2/3/09 via Mobile
Máire McManus
Hey kev! Im just in bed was workin last nite ;-) im a sorta tired now! I no i av to but back on goin out too coz its not healthy! ;-)
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2/2/09
Orla Reilly
id like to see how long the break from booze wud last!!
home in about two wks cant fricken wait!! helen and muireann were out ere for a wkend tho wich was great craic!! so hows the job hunting goin? ne luck yet? i was doing up my CV yest...BORING!!......i need to start applyin too...dreadin it it!! 
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Pól Mac An Phríora2/2/09
well man,how were ya yesterday after?was pretty fucked myself!!ya back in dublin?
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2/2/09
Orla Reilly
Hey kev ne craic?? wots new bk home?? were all snowed in over ere....college is closed so happy days!!
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2/1/09
Sharon
ahh did saturday nite fever hit ya?
Claires wos good enuf craic, went to coppers afterwards, was packed!! Ya in dub dis wk?
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Máire McManus2/1/09
im always out every sat nite in de town im goin back 2 dub next week so hopefully il get out loads up der....wat about u?
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2/1/09 via Mobile
Máire McManus
Ah things r de exact same im stil in college n workin in esker. Same as always. How about urself? U get a job yet?
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Sharon1/31/09
Still not gonna be convinced to go out tonight?!?
Coppers might have changed since wed nite!
- 1/31/09 via Mobile
Don't be a menace to south central can teach u many tings!!
Sharon 0 Replieserrrrmmmmmmmmmm...................
Kevin O Neill 1 Reply...................
This is the first symbol i seen in my room!!
Sharon 0 RepliesCan ya guess wat it is????????