YEW NOE UR A MAORI WEN...
>-You go to the ball with your cousin.
>-A nice restaurant is an 'all you can eat' place.
>-Someone in your family got pregnant at 15.
>-A sleeve is a form of tissue for your nose.
>-You have to do dishes more than 3 times a day.
>-Breakfast is the left over food from last night.
>-Your sent to pick watercress for a funeral, 3 oclock in the morning.
>-You organise for a get together at 2 oclock, and everyone shows up at
5.
>-You get a hiding with a jandal/gumboot/chord/spoon
>-You can sprint barefoot on sharp rocks
>-You visit cuzzies, and someones wearing the clothes you left behind last time.
>-You and your cousins sit around, and dis everyone who walks past.
>-Your brother is over protective of you, then he beats up his missus.
>-You have brothers or sisters with different mothers or fathers.
>-You give the longest shout outs on the radio.
>-You have 6 people in the back seat of the car.
>-You go home after school on a Wednesday, and your parents are having a party.
>-In a photo, someones pulling some kind of gang related hand signal.
>-Your mum cuts your hair cos you keep getting kutu's.
>-Your at a party, and your aunty turns the stereo off then starts playing the guitar.
>-You know all the words to 10 guitars.
>-You see someone wearing your shoes that went missing at the marae.
>-The words 'ow' 'chur' and 'sweet' are part of your vocabulary.
>-you go to school to eat the other kids lunch -
>-you go to school to watch the teacher teach the other kids
>-you giv the pakeha kid a hiding for calling you dum
>- bullrush was your fav sport
>-You get ur pakeha partner to go rent the flat
>-you think ur tribe is the best in the world
>-your dad cuts your hair, gets hoha and leaves the other half for the next day after school!!
>-your older brother makes you cry and your the one who gets a hiding for crying
>-all your marbles are ball bearings and you try to pass them off as steelies
>-Hello and goodbye is said by raising your eyebrows.
>-you laughed at how the crocodile hunter died.
>-your jandals / gumboots are: ur running shoes, ur workshoes, ur flippers and ur going out shoes.
>-your swimming togs is a shorts and t-shirt. (and ur in Maui, Hawaii, where all they wear is bikinis).
>-you do bombs at the public pools where it says no bombing.
>-brushing your hair is ... just putting on a beanie.
>-your Dad is also your Koro
>-you start driving, smoking and drinking when you are in form one
>-you're good at touch
>-at least one of your relations is a Coconut
>-you cant speak Maori but are fluent when you are drunk
>-you laugh at everyone who cant sing
>-you laugh at everyone who cant dance
>-you laugh at everyone who cant do both at the same time
>-your at a party with the guitar and everyone only knows half the words to all the songs u sing
>-you go to a party and at least a couple of ur relatives are sleeping on the table
>-you go to a party in three days time and its still going
>-you go to a party and they start passing round da cowboy hat 4 beers
>-you go diving with one flipper
>-playing the spoons is right up there for percussion to the guitar.
>-gumboots, jandals & a swandri are all considered #1's.
>-the whanau hangi sacks and baskets get passed down to you
>-rotten foods are a delicacy
>-you try the whakapapa/tino rangatiratanga line to get into a public event