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- here ali, watch this for a horsebox"
- Me, Myself, and I
- things you really miss when you have no money:
I love the Hills:
"im going to forgive you heidi, but now i wanna forget you"
And when I fuck up,
I REALLY fuck up
I LOVE MY HORSEY
Colonel Fitzwilliam! what are you all doing here? snooping around my private life, i suppose. well, i'll save you the bother. its been forty years since my dishonourable discharge from the army,and ive been cleverly avoiding detection since then by masquerading as a schoolgirl.i reside in a small nuclear bunker just off the M50, growing what food and beauty products i need in a small organic vegetable patch. its a harsh life, but after years of service in special operations culminating in a cruel and unfair dismissal (damn you, bingley!)i suppose things are relatively peachy, aren't they?
- The Other Half Of Me
shoes are for the weak
- dan le sac vs scroobius pip
- thou shalt not express your surprise that sharon got off with brad at a club last night by saying "izzit?"
- dan le sac vc scroobius pip. vitalic. queen adreena. porcelain and the tramps. cathy davey. the postal service. playradioplay!. gorillaz. tiesto. tegan and sara. ted leo. owl city. say anything. daft punk. the medic droid. css. mgmt. straylight run. xavier rudd. sia. hadouken. enter shikari. alexisonfire. 2manydjs. devendra banhart. sufjan stevens. bobby mcferrin. rediscover. cobra starship. sia. the automatic. dallas green. regina spektor. imogen heap.
- appreciating "quality mullets", rosie, TOOTLING, dancing like ones limbs are no longer attached, real smokes, FREDDIE, aifric, michaels alter egos, pooting and lillaging, making contact lenses last four days, sapecoc, finding truly excellent walls, car dance, night drives, sarah finn, hamncheez, easter dinner, being wicked as a joyride
- on a scale of one to poo
- having to give up my horsey for the summer, drunken phone calls to out of county exs, being assaulted by the AIB people in UCD, the resulting terror of the aib student mastercard - student BASTARDcard, more like, how rosie smells like a garlic pub, AIFRICS CAST, when im REALLY REALLY bad, flibbertigibbets, when aifric catches me on my way out from the sweet cupboard and makes me empty my pockets, when she makes me make her dinner and then takes a photo of it to show people and ridicule my culinary skills, the fact that right now i should be studying estoppel, estoppel
- hiking through puddles wearing really small wellies.
- SARAH FINN
- incidentally, my tagline has nothing to do with horses, strangely enough; instead, this is the scenario:
sarah finn: (examines three quarter full bottle of druids) "here, ali watch this for a horsebox"
- up the yard with ye
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- an unparalleled genius
- a marshmallow
i am the nin of the lake,
i go boarding on the wake,
i like to drive my ship, but only in the nip,
i am the nin nin nin of the lake
on hearing our plans to dress up as the great nin for halloween:
mark: "you women"
us: "you fairy"
"yeah, Dad, im just down in kilkenny now"
"what are you doing putting on your seatbelt? you're in the country now!"
there's no such thing as drinkdriving down here. its fundriving"
"are ye members of the yacht club?"
"so your boat; it has two engines, does it?"
*naomi scrapes bottom of pot and looks up expectantly*:
"bring me round three"
on using dishes: "sure theres no point wasting them, you'll only have to be washing them then"
"you see this thing? if its like this, it means the boat is probably upside down"
"this is the speedometer. its broken. and this here is a temperature gauge, but, (taps glass) its broken. and this is the water switch (holds up dodgy looking mass of wires about three feet from the tap) and these are the engines. that one doesnt work."
"yeah, we're rolling with about 36 horsepower."
"ooh, stinky winky!"
"i feel like stephen hawking"
"have some mechanical sympathy would you???"
"here we find the reclusive lake dwelling nin, and we seem to have interrupted it on its washday when it is most vulnerable, due to lack of nins"
"cheese is a kind of meat..."
"is there another shop here?"
"shops over there; what would ye be wanting two fer, anyway?"
on the subject of the swan: "the dirty nordy bastard"
"well, i got drunk, ran around like an eejit, and now im going to sleep"
*ali goes down slide, reaches bottom, looks annoyed* "that was shit. im off"
"what would we have WELLIES for? we live in DUBLIN"
0 Comments 260 weeks
Sape coc is a fundamentally new idea that, with specific reliance on certain conditions and terms (which may in fact be variable) will come in to foundation early next year.
The idea came one summer's eve, when two naughty little children, Triar Fuck and Hobbin Rood and a list of disreputable bandits broke in to a house party hosted by one twenty nine year old aviater clad man (who had turned DJ for the purposes of entertainment,) and attended by his friend, the bogger with the dread locks.
Now, at this time their best friend, Nerrifov Shottingham was sadly incarcerated to an early bed (in a room which incidently she disliked due to the curtains not being heavy enough, a twin had died in that room, and there was a stuffed rat in a wedding dress on top of the fire) by virtue of an unfortunate experience with her friend and nemises "Vunxov Chom"
Needless to say, there was no party without Nerrifov, so Triar and Hobbin resorted to pooting and lilliging. Items pooted and lillaged included "Disco Queen" pink nail polish, rastafarian playing cards, Toni and Guy "funky gum", a stapler (complete with a second pack of staples) and two cartons of marlboro light unmarked cigarettes.
Triar and Hobbin made an "M" shape with their hands and stated the magic words "MAA" which transported them (plus disreputable bandits) back to the Dourth Fimension. Ah. Safe at last.
Triar and Hobbin were extremely proud of their poot, so proud that Hobbin ran up to the room with the light curtains to inform Nerrifov. Nerrifov, however, was unimpressed as she was still suffering from the effects of her battle with Vunxov. She sang the anti-siren serenade, the powerful "Piss off" song, and Hobbin eventually got the point, and decided to fully inform Nerrifov in the morrow.
The morrow arrived and Nerrifov was in a considerably better mood. This was perhaps due to the balance of moods, as Hobbin was in a considerably worse mood as he had just learned of Nerrifov's battle with Vunxov, and was not a happy homosapien..
However, it was time to discuss Sape Coc, the coc of lillage and pooting.
Due to the predisposition of the three to already atire themselves in Sapes, they suddenly realised that the wearing of Sapes could be a considerable advantage when they poot and lillage.
Careful designing and planning ensued, and the model sape was decided upon.
It would be large, and black, with a large hood that was to be worn heavily and completely over the head, so that identities are not recognised.
It would have elastic jar holders to hold jars of lillaged poot, which could be opened and released when needs be.
Around the neck and inside the sape, all members must carry a portable CD player (and preferably spare batteries) so that they could play Carl Orf's Carmena Buerana on a considerably loud volume (but an even number in respect to the OCD habits of Triar).
Heely's should be purchased to give the effect gliding and worn underneath sape on feet.
Now. To aid in their hobby, extra volumes of material should be attached to the insides of the sape. This will be useful in situations where one is trying to poot a large item, such as a car. One member could be sat on roof of said car, with released material volumes draped over car (done via an intricate method of pieces of string) while the subsequent members surround car and surround sides of car with sape material.
They will either shrink the car (with use of handy magic words MAA and handgestures) or glide away with it.
Smaller items, such as children, should just be draped y regular sized sape and shrank and jarred.
It is desirable that all Sape Coc members have at least one small child in a jar, as this can be freed and used to lillage smaller items of poot.
All Sape Coc members should have a special pet, with special powers, to be kept inside sape. Hobbin has a monkey named Bartek.
We are predicting clashes with dissident group Game Soc in early spring. Bartek w
0 Comments 272 weeks
we were asked to warch a fulin and ciara sai it qas funy that we said filum in 2 syllables so then we drunk! gave ciara the whiskey and said don’t be fucked and then aifri sdaid were no smoking to get drunk child and tyoed it al kdown on my computer
then we made som ewickey coffee and ciara clled me weejit acoe i cant type WAS GONNA BE LOBwell which isn tfaor !!!
nad then dhild i said NO! I sid non of thatr! Its enough! We aredrunk! And we have had too much wi=huchey! AND ITS LOCELY but i got a bit sick, jusr a little, AND I THOUGHT IT LOVELY!! She threatens to kill us be she LIES!!!!!!!!!!
Have some crunchy nut and don’t be fucked ciara!!! Don’t be fucjek!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I luv ciara and ali!!
Have some crunchy nut and c=don’t b educked ciara!=
And her sofeds the diary of ali anf airfic and ciara we aere drnkn!!!
And tehn airfiric asjked how fun is drink and we asidh it s lo velyt!!!!
I yhoght it would be lovelt ....
SND IT WAWS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
0 Comments 295 weeks
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