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- Me, Myself, and I
- Hi, i live in basingstoke but i'm in Germany at the mo have been for nearly 2 years. just done my tour in afghan 22 showin 13 how its done... now time 2 relax 4 a bit
- three doors down, puddle of mud, Oasis, nickelback, green day, linkin park all kinds but mostly Dance
- band of brothers, just friends, the girl next door, die hard 1, 2, 3 and 4, queen of the damned, TOP GUN!!!!
- football, tennis n anythin my m8s r playin
- Scared Of
- a few things
- Happiest When
- i'm always happy
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there is discipline in a soldier
you can see it when he walks
there is honour in a soldier
you can hear it when he talks
there is courage in a soldier
you can see it in his eyes
there is loyalty in a soldier
that will not compromise
there is something in a soldier
that makes him stand apart
there is strength in a soldier
that beats from his heart
a soldier isnt a title any man can hire to do
a soldier is the soul of that man
buried deep inside you
a soldiers job isnt finished after
an 8 hour day or a 40 hour week
a soldier is always a soldier
even when he sleeps
a soldier serves his country first
and his life is left behind
a soldier must sacrifice what
comes first in a civlians mind
0 Comments 257 weeks
I had a neighbor, and whenever he would knock on my wall I knew he wanted me to turn my music down, and that made me angry because I like loud music, so when he knocked on the wall I’d mess with his head. I’d say: “Go around! I cannot open the wall. I don’t know if you have a doorknob on the other side, but over here there’s nothing. It’s just flat.”
I went camping once, and got into an argument with a girlfriend in the tent. This is a really bad place to get in an argument, because I walked out and attempted to “slam the flap.” How are you supposed to express your anger in this type of situation? Zipper it up really quick?
At the end of my letters I like to write “PS: this is what part of the alphabet would look like…if Q and R were eliminated.”
0 Comments 266 weeks
I wanna get a job naming kitchen appliances. Refrigerator, toaster, blender; you just say what the thing does then you add “er.” Kitchen Appliance Naming Institute. “What does this thing do?” “It keeps shit fresh.” “Well, that’s a fresher. I’m going on break.”
I saw on HBO, they were advertising this boxing match. They said “It’s a fight to the finish.” That’s a good place to end.
I got a “Do-Not-Disturb” sign on my hotel door. It says “Do Not Disturb”; it’s time we go with “Don’t Disturb”. It’s been “Do Not” for too long. We need to embrace the contraction. “Don’t disturb”; “Do Not” psyches you out. “Do”: “Alright, I get to disturb this guy”. “Not”: “Shit! I need to read faster!”
If you find yourself lost in the woods, fuck it, build a house. “Well, I was lost, but now I live here. I have severely improved my predicament!”
One time, this guy handed me a picture of him, he said, “Here’s a picture of me when I was younger.” Every picture is of you when you were younger. “Here’s a picture of me when I’m older.” “You son of a bitch! How’d you pull that off? Lemme see that camera!”
I think they could take sesame seeds off the market, and I wouldn’t even care. I can’t imagine five years from now saying, “Damn, remember sesame seeds? What happened? All the buns are blank!” They’re gonna have to change that McDonald’s song, “Two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions, on a … bun.” How does a sesame seed stick to a bun? Thats fucking magical! There’s got to be some sesame seed glue out there! Either that or they’re adhesive on one side. Take the sesame seed out, remove the backing, place it on the bun. Now your bun will look spectacular! What does a sesame seed grow into? I dunno, we never give them a chance.
I’d like to see a forklift lift a crate of forks. It’d be so damn literal. “Hey, you’re using that machine to its exact purpose!” “That machine has been misunderstood for years!”
0 Comments 266 weeks