this 1's 4 da laydies

1. give me ur number?
2. love me?
3. let me kiss u?
4. watch a movie with me?
5. have dinner with me?
6. drive me somewhere?
7. take a shower with me?
8. be my gf?
9. tell me u think im cute?
10. buy me a drink if i didnt have money?
11. take me home for da nite?my house r ur house?
12. let me sleep in ur bed?
13. make love with me?
14. put dis on your blog 2 let me answer ur questions?
15. do u think im attractive, beautiful or sexy?
16. do u like my style?
17. do u think im funny?
18. do u care about me?
19. would u dance wit me?
20. would u sing happy b'day 2 me?

oh yeah do you lot want a little joke. ok den read dis !!!!

WHITE FRIENDS: Never ask for food
MY NIGGAZ : Are the reason you have no food.

WHITE FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr. and Mrs.
MY NIGGAZ : Call your parents mom and dad.

WHITE FRIENDS: Bail you out of jail and tell you what you did was wrong.
MY NIGGAZ : Would be sitting next to you saying, Damn...we fucked up...but that shit was fun!"

WHITE FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.
MY NIGGAZ : Cry with you.

WHITE FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back.
MY NIGGAZ : Keep your shit so long they forget it's yours.

WHITE FRIENDS: know a few things about you.
MY NIGGAZ : Could write a book with direct quotes from you.

WHITE FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that's what the crowd is doing.
MY NIGGAZ : Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you.

WHITE FRIENDS: Would knock on your door.
MY NIGGAZ : Walk right in and say, "I'm home!"

WHITE FRIENDS: Are for a while.
MY NIGGAZ : Are for life.

WHITE FRIENDS: Will take your drink away when they think you've had enough.
MY NIGGAZ : Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say, "Bitch, you better drink the rest of that, you know we don't waste!!"

WHITE FRIENDS: Will talk shit to the person who talks shit about you.
MY NIGGAZ : Will knock them the fuck out!!

WHITE FRIENDS: Will read this.
MY NIGGAS : Will steal this, just like i did

PRICELESS JAMAICAN TRANSLATIONS

ENG: It's been a long time since I have seen you girl.
JAM: Gal yuh nuh dead yet?

ENG: Oh Lord, we have lost electricity again.
JAM: Lawd Gad current lack aff again to rahtid.

ENG: This meal is not too bad.
JAM: Di food can eat.

ENG: Where did you buy that awful Bracelet Cindy?
JAM: A weh yuh buy dat deh big ole hugly bangle deh misis?

ENG: Hors d'heurves
JAM: Ah wah dis likkle sinting you a gi me?

ENG: Here kitty kitty... get down from the roof.
JAM: Hey dutty puss come aff a di house tap before a buss yuh **?@!

ENG: I think something is wrong with Susan, she might have the flu.
JAM: Lawd gad obeah tek up Suzie!

ENG: Oh my God, I just broke mom's expensive plate!
JAM: Lawd mi gad, mi bruk up mama stoosh crackry!

ENG: aren't those pants a bit short?
JAM: you did a expect flood or yuh tek yuh measurment inna wata?

ENG: Why are you squeezing the mangoes like that?
JAM: Lissen to mi nuh, mi a beg yuh stap fingle-fingle up di mango dem.

ENG: Sir, please don't throw my luggage like that.
JAM: Aye buff teet bwoy, tap fling up-fling up mi bag dem suh man.

ENG: I wish you would quit lying.
JAM: Tap di blinkin lyin, yuh ole liyad.

ENG: Lift up the hood of the car for me John.
JAM: Hey my yute, fly di bonett rasta!

ENG: I am Waiting for a taxi and it's taking so long!
JAM: But wait, no Robot naah run todey!

ENG: Get me a pop please.
JAM: Beg yuh carry wan drinks fi mi deh

ENG: It's time for a Perm.
JAM: Gal yuh head waan Cream, yuh nuh si how it tough?

ENG: Yuck!! This is nasty.
JAM: Kiss mi neck back!! What a sinting tase bad.

ENG: I wish you would close your mouth.
JAM: yuh mout come in like when grip cyaan shut.

ENG: Girl, your acne is terrible.
JAM: Massa gad, pickney, yuh face bumpy-bumpy an fayva grayta eeh.

ENG: Please make some room on the bus so this man can have a seat.
JAM: Schoolas, small up unnu self man mek daddy siddung.

ENG: I have a stomach ache.
JAM: Mi belly ah gripe mi.

ENG: These mangoes look a bit over ripe.
JAM: Missis move fram in front ah mi wid dem fluxy mango deh

ENG: He has very large full eyes.
JAM: Wat ah bway fayva patoo


ENG: He has no manners.
JAM: Him dont have no broughtupsi!

ENG: perspiration odour
JAM: him smell green

ENG: poached (boiled) chicken
JAM: dat deh sinting nuh start cook yet

ENG: oh, dear
JAM:ee-eeeee

ENG: Josh is suffering from Attention Deficit disorder.
JAM: Di pickeny too dam hard ears!

ENG: He has a touch of Dyslexia.
JAM: What a bway Dunce sah!

ENG: I need a bottle of Peptobismal...my stomach hurts.
JAM: Lawd mi coulda do wid a wash out yah now... mi belly bine up.

ENG: That man over there is missing his dentures.
JAM: Cooh pan dat deh mashmout bredda ova deh soh.

ENG: OH my, your feet are so ashy...
JAM: yuh foot tuff like aligata back....yuh couldn't rub likkle cocoa
nut oil pon yuh foot dem...

Roses are red , JAMAICANS are black
thats my race , Dont u like that!!
My JAMAICAN pride , I will not hide
My JAMAICAN race , I will not disgrace
My JAMAICAN blood , flows hot & true
My JAMAICAN peeps , I will stand by you
thru thick & thin , till the day we die
Our JAMAICAN flag , Always stands high
I yell this poem , Louder than all the rest.
cuz every 1 knows , JAMAICANS ARE THE BEST!!!
JAMAICAN Pride in my mind , JAMAICAN BLOOD is my kind
So step aside and let me through , Cuz its all about the JAMAICAN crew
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