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- Male, 21, 135
- from a testing lab somewhere in sholing (i am the chav killer 3000 muhahahaha)
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- Member since: September 2006
- Last active: 2/22/10
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- Me, Myself, and I
hi im ryan. I am 17 i live in Southampton and went to Chamberlayne park but now im free!! and go to Southampton college XD do a course called BTEC National Diploma level 3 in Production Arts (Technical) play guitar in the band along with mish matt chris and jax. My room is one BIG assed doodle pad . I live in sholing. i love going to the cinema and i like to draw random doodles XD it is recommended to keep me away from guitars as you will not get it off me easily the same goes for knifes and thats all you need to know bye oh and that Molly Elizebeth Martinson is the best in the universe >.<
they say i'm mental but i'm just confused
thay say i'm mental but i've been abused
they say i'm mental cause i'm not amused by it all
- this box is way too small to list all the music i listen to
MUSIC IS MY LIFE!!!!!!
- Madagascar, ice age, stay alive, all the saw's etc. mostly horrors and kids films lol XD oo Sweeney Todd is ace
- msn and myspace
add me XD
- Scared Of
- the ground, no honestly it hurts
- Happiest When
- with friends, on holiday, playing guitar, banjo, drums or drawing
- Best Friends
- matt, mish, jax, chris and who ever is reading this now lol
- Chris Stone
- Joshua John King
- Its Mr Billy Bob
- Niamh - Gracee'
- Jordan Sanders
- Youre A Fucking Riot
- Dan Matthews
- H O Y
- James B
- Brent Milner
- Everyones Fav Jesus L...
- Zoe Squishy Melon
- Spank The Monkey
- Joiners Promotions
- 30 Seconds To Mars
- Sweeney Todd
- Obsession About Fluro Colours
- DC shoe Lovers
- the converse lovers
- Sponge Bob Square Pants
- the jelly beans
- Ice Cream Appreciation Group
- The Steve Irwin Memorial Club
- Bean's Mum Fan Club
- xx The Nightmare Before Christmas Fan club xx
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As you might have already read the meaning of CHAV stands for Council Housed And Violent. Some people may have different meanings but this one sums up the common chav.
There are now many different types of CHAV due to the simple nature of the beast. This beast generally hangs around in packs with a pack leader. This leader is supposed to be the bravest, the funniest and the hardest. He has had plenty of fights with other beasts, can smoke, drink cheap lager, smoke weed and swear 3 or 4 times in a sentence if that is what you can call it. Most sentences from these beasts are usually made up from their native tongue that us normal humans cannot understand. Some of the common words used are …
Safe - Is it trying to tell you he is safe or you are safe as your now with the pack
Init - Not sure on the meaning of this as it seems to have no particular place, it has a multi-function capability
Bra - Not of the women's type, this means you're a brother, a friend and can even be used an enemy pack in an aggressive form - "wha ya lookin at bra"
Fanks - This is a form of thank you, you will be very lucky to get this word out them.
Ere - This can be in form of "Here" or "Ear" or "Hear", multi -function word again
There are many many more but I won't list them, many of them are swear words spelt incorrectly. The majority of the words in the CHAV vocabulary are every day English words spelt incorrectly or abbreviated.
How to spot a CHAV ? - Basically they seem to wear cheap sports gear and a baseball cap, some wear sock hats while others wear hoodies. The CHAV attire is usually paid for by "bumming" off parents or profit through crime. Different types of CHAV have different styles even if they grow up, get a job, buy a car etc the instinct is still there. The CHAV can also be recognised by the amount of fake/cheap jewellery on display in conjunction with the above attire.
CHAV behaviour ? - This can vary between each pack of CHAV, the common CHAV hangs around street corners, pub car parks, outside the "Chippy" or shops in general. Sometimes you can avoid the CHAV behaviour if the pack leader is not looking or not there. If he is there he has this compelling need to stare at you like a dog challenging another. This can sometimes be taken further by a sentence that you will probably need an animal language interpreter to decipher. If you are really unlucky, this pack leader my need to show his strength to the pack by attacking you. Even though this beast is quite primitive they have mastered the ability to record things on mobile phones so they can show other packs and howl like hyenas. Be very careful if you attack this beast back as the video footage can be edited to show you poking at his cage and provoking him into biting you. Remember the CHAV are a protected specie by a government group called the "Police". The CHAV have a number of interests and hobbies which consist of fighting, stealing, being abusive, picking on normal humans, happy slapping and if old enough benefit claiming, when he is slightly older he will move on to career benefit claming and possibly fraud. The CHAV can be social to his pack or other packs by stealing a car, setting fire to it and having a barbeque at the expense of a normal human.
Types of CHAV ? - As mentioned there are a few types of this beast and I will try to break them down a little for you.
Common CHAV - Is basically as described above and aged between 10 to 18, this CHAV is everywhere you look on council estates or the local shops. Sometimes they venture out onto other territory such as city centres if they are brave. This variety usually loves cheap gold or silver and pretends its white gold. The common CHAV are usually lead by a pack leader and if singled out start whining and whimpering like a scared puppy. Just remember before you do anything to him that they are local and will find out where you live.
0 Comments 315 weeks
Gangsta CHAV - Be careful with this CHAV, each member of the pack as well as the pack leader has something to prove to each other, I'm guessing to gain respect. This variety generally wears baggy trousers that don't fit and hoodies to hide that beast of a face. This variety generally listens to rap/gansta music to get ideas to complete the wannabe look and attitude. This CHAV relies on his rough looks to intimidate you as they thrive on your fear. This variety can sometimes handle themselves in a fight and dislikes other packs as well as normal humans. This CHAV is more likely to be high on something other than glue and has to commit crime to pay for it. To determine who is the pack leader, this animal usually has some huge gold chain around its neck but it won't let you take it for walks.
Working CHAV - This is a CHAV that has grown up, got a job but the animal instinct is still there. He may have job but still can't dress properly and wears slightly more expensive sports wear and caps. This variety of the specie has a slightly better vocabulary than the common CHAV but you can still tell its there. This CHAV usually owns a car that he is trying to turn into a race car or at least making it look "bad". This variety likes to stare at you at traffic lights and rev his engine in an attempt to provoke you into a race. Most of these rev too high and stall as you drive away slowly and you can feel the heat off their face. Those who do manage not to stall pull off revving like mad and going nowhere due to its small engine and he didn't see your 1.8i 16v badge on the back(in my case). This CHAV seems to think that putting a huge exhaust on the back will improve performance and make him look cool. This CHAV lowers his car for better handling and then realises he lives on a council estate with huge speed bumps - very clever. However, all the work he has done on the car really impresses his "chavette" so he is happy.
Posh CHAV - This CHAV is probably a little rich kid who has got into the wrong circle of friends, generally the same in appearance but much quieter in the pack. This pack member comes from private housing and is being rebellious, fortunately for us normal humans he is no trouble and stays away from confrontation. This CHAV can be well spoke and believe it or not well educated and may even go to University one day(so keep your hopes up parents). This variety tries to gain respect by spending his money on the pack and wearing more expensive clothes and jewellery than them so they look up to him. This CHAV will probably wear expensive branded sports gear or the ever popular Burberry. When this little CHAV grows up he will either drop his pack and join a new up market one or may even grow up completely and look back on his stupidity as a teenage fad. If worse comes to worse he will still be CHAV and buy a proper sports car and drive around like Nigel Mansell in an F1 car and impress his pack with it. This CHAV hardly races anyone at traffic lights unless you have a high powered car yourself, as he knows he can beat you and has nothing to gain.
Chavette - last of all the "Chavette", this is the female of the specie and generally fits into one of the categories depending on which one her boyfriend is in. This variety has the worst vocabulary, body language and dress sense. The common and the gansta chavette are more likely to be come pregnant at an early age because they think they are entitled to a free house and equipment and the government will let them. The more kids they have the bigger the house they can have, as they see it. They don't want to work as its easy dragging a kid up, palming it off on people while you go spending your money on booze, fags and cheap clothes. Unfortunately the offspring grows up seeing exactly how to sponge off society and follows the parent's footsteps. On rare occasions, the brain might kick in and think "hey I want my kids to have more than I did, I think I need an education and good
0 Comments 315 weeks
A BLACK MAN WALKS INTO A CAFE EARLY ONE MORNING AND NOTICES HE'S THE ONLY ONE THERE
AS HE SAT DOWN HE NOTICED A WHITE MAN SAT BEHIND HIM, THE WHITE MAN SAID "COLOURED PEOPLE ARN'T ALLOWED IN HERE" .
THE BLACK MAN REPLIED...
"WHEN I WAS BORN I WAS BLACK
WHEN I GREW UP I WAS BLACK
WHEN I'M SICK I'M BLACK
WHEN I GO IN THE SUN I'M BLACK
WHEN I'M COLD I'M BLACK
AND WHEN I DIE I'M BLACK.
BUT YOU SIR...
WHEN YOU WERE BORN YOU WERE PINK
WHEN YOUR'E SICK YOUR'E GREEN
WHEN YOU STAY IN THE SUN YOUR'E RED
WHEN YOUR'E COLD YOU TURN BLUE
AND WHEN YOU DIE YOU TURN "PURPLE."
"AND YET YOU HAVE THE NERVE TO CALL ME COLOURED"
THE BLACK MAN TURNED BACK AROUND AND THE WHITE MAN WALKED AWAY.
0 Comments 315 weeks
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