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Christopher Muir

He is not the messiah, Hes a very naughty boy!!

12/2/09 | me too! | Reply

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  • Male, 28, Luv 154
  • from Orkney
  • I am Engaged
  • Profile views: 8,215
  • Member since: August 2006
  • Last active: 8/30/10
  • www.bebo.com/muir718
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About Me

Tagline
SUCK ME WAD!!!!!!!
Me, Myself, and I
Yo dudes!! me names Chris but most folk call me Fester, bit of a long story so i wont go into it!! Im ex army and now a member of the kirkwall Territorial Army (part timer). Im a BIG BIG AC/DC fan as BON SCOTT (The almighty legendary god himself) Is my hero of all time and love me rock and heavy metal!! so if theres anyone oot there thats interested in joining the kirkwall T.A. then gae me a shout!! Scratch ya's later!! one other thing, GET IT UP YA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Me msn address is: muir718@hotmail.co.uk If ya want me to fart in your face


Sagittarius
Spontanious. Sexy. High sex appeal.
good in bed. Rare to find. Good when found.
Outstanding kisser.Loves being in long relationships
The Other Half Of Me
Katherine M

Katherine M

Blames her farts on the rabbits!!!

Music
ROCK N' ROLL MOTHERFUCKERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Films
PORN, PORN, PORN, PORN, PORN, PORN, PORN, PORN, PORN, PORN, EVEN MORE PORN AND EVEN MORE PORN!! and MORE PORN!!!!
Favoriate alcholic bevrages
LAGER, MORGANS, WHISKEY, EVEN MORE LAGER!!!! If you see me in the pub then buy me a pint or i will fart on you!!!
Scared Of
AMERICANS!!! Holy shit they scared shit oot o me oot in flip flop land (IRAQ)!!! Camel spiders, scorpians and Arabs!!! poopy porn!!! its fucking minging!!
Happiest When
Im naked or pissed!! Wae the awsomeness of Katherine chilling out on the couch!!!
Sports
Pocket billiards, strokeing the snake, hurling abuse, avoiding stalkers!!!
Biggest pet hates!!!
Arse crawlers, attention seeking tossers, shit stirers, wannabie goths, scroungers(specially when you were enjoying a pint), stewart baker, folk wae extremly bad BO!!! Tax spongers! folk that reckon they know there rock music!!! JORDAN AND PETER ANDRE!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRGGGG
 GGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!! JESUS FUCKIN CHRIST FOLKS JUST FUCK OFF!!!

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  • THE WILDHEARTS- CAFFEINE BOMB

    Eyes dried tight, gotta get myself together
    Need a kick-start cocktail, ten percent coffee with a
    High-rise, family-size, guaranteed to catonize
    The little bit of brain I got a-hanging on from last night

    I need a double take, a-just to get awake
    To try and counteract the hollow feeling nature makes
    It's gonna work a treat, gonna get me on my feet
    It's a teasing little tonic with a kick
    Like a mule
    And a skip on the beat

    It ain't right, It ain't wrong
    I need a bomb, I need a caffeine bomb
    Too sweet, too strong
    I need a bomb, I need a caffeine bomb
    I need a bomb, I need a caffeine bomb
    I need a bomb, I need a ca-ca-ca-ca caffeine bomb

    Over-do the sugar and the coffee and the whiskey
    In my biggest mug 'til the varnish starts to melt
    I got a wake-up shake, any webbing I'm a-shredding
    Any grogginess I felt before I sweated
    All the poison
    From my body to my quilt

    And it's been too long
    I need a bomb, I need a caffeine bomb
    What a buzz, What a song
    I need a bomb, I need a caffeine bomb
    I need a bomb, I need a caffeine bomb
    I need a bomb, I need a ca-ca-ca-ca-ca-ca caffeine bomb

    Hangover, so hungover
    Pour me a doctor, send it over
    Something that'll stop my legs from shaking
    Something that'll stop my head from aching
    Hangover, so hung over
    Breath of a juiced-up holy roller pounding

    Baby can't you see, I'm shitting out water
    It's a case of easy come and easy go-o
    I need a caffeine bomb to wake me in the morning
    I need a caffeine bomb to get me to the show
    Oh no, I think I wanna throw

    Hands all sticky and I'm spilling all my whiskey on myself
    My friends, my dog, my floor
    My God, my head feels like

    0 Comments 293 weeks

  • OTHER FREINDS VS MILITARY FREINDS!!!

    OTHER FREINDS: NEVER ASK FOR FOOD
    MILITARY FREINDS: ARE THE REASON YOU DONT HAVE FOOD


    OTHER FREINDS: CALL YOUR PARENTS MR AND MRS
    MILITARY FREINDS: CALL YOUR PARENTS MUM AND DAD

    OTHER FRIENDS: BAIL YOU OUT OF JAIL AND TELL YOU WHAT YOU DID WAS WRONG
    MILTARY FRIENDS: WOULD BE SITTING NEXT TO YOU IN THE JAIL SAYING "THAT WAS MINT BUT HOW DO WE GET OUT"


    OTHER FRIENDS: HAVE NEVER SEEN YOU CRY
    MILTARY FRIENDS: WILL CRY WITH YOU


    OTHER FRIENDS: BORROW YOU STUFF FOR A FEW DAYS THEN GIVE IT BACK
    MILITARY FRIENDS: KEEP YOUR STUFF SO LONG THEY FORGET ITS YOURS


    OTHER FRIENDS: KNOW A FEW THINGS ABOUT YOU
    MILITARY FRIENDS: COULD WRITE A BOOK WITH DIRECT QUOTES FROM YOU


    OTHER FRIENDS: WILL LEAVE YOU BEHIND IF THATS WHAT THE CROWDS DOING
    MILITARY FRIENDS: WILL KICK THE WHOLE CROWDS ASS THAT LEFT YOU

    OTHER FRIENDS: WOULD KNOCK ON YOUR DOOR
    MILITARY FRIENDS: WALK RIGHT IN AND SAY "IM HOME"


    OTHER FRIENDS: ARE FOR A WHILE
    MILITARY FRIENDS: ARE FOR LIFE


    OTHER FRIENDS: WILL TAKE YOUR DRINKS AWAY WHEN THEY THINK YOU HAVE HAD ENOUGH
    MILITARY FRIENDS: WILL LOOK AT YOU STUMBLING ALL OVER THE PLACE AND SAY "YOU BETTER DRINK THE REST OF THAT YOU PUSSY"


    OTHER FRIENDS: WILL TALK SHIT TO THE PERSON WHO TALKS SHIT ABOUT YOU
    MILITARY FRIENDS: WILL KNOCK THEM OUT

    2 Comments 334 weeks

  • SCOTTISH PUT DOWNS

    scottish put-downs!

    Scottish put-downs (rudeness...love it!!)


    She's got a face like a dug lickin p!sh aff a nettle

    She's got a face that could make an onion cry

    I wouldn't ride her into battle

    Everyone has a right to be ugly, but she abuses the privilege

    I would nae do her with a rusty pole

    Mair chins than a chinese phone book

    She smells like an alkies carpet

    She has seen more japs eyes than an oriental optician

    It's like sh*gg1n a pail of water

    It's like sh*gg1n the sleeve aff a wizards cloak!

    She's killed more c!cks than a fowl butcher

    F@nny like a ripped out fireplace

    Ar$e like a bag o washing

    Your face could get a job haunting houses

    She sweats like a dog in a Chinese restaurant

    She's seen more helmets than Hitler

    The wheels turning but the hamsters died

    She has been c*cked more times than Davy Crocket's Musket

    She's got a f@nny like a badly packed kebab

    1 Comment 335 weeks

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Little boys love your action movies. And earlier in your career an entirely different sort of boy loved your early movies.

These days you spend your time between movies binge eating and working out like crazy to make weight for the next Hollywood action movie role.
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  • Savaka
    Savaka

    I earned $157 in a month browsing the internet! Heres how - http://x.co/KT9b Dont forget to thank me!

    11/22/10
  • Chris K
    Chris K

    Hey everyone! Add my new profile!!!! http://goo.gl/zQ5Do

    11/20/10
  • Stephen R
    luv Stephen R

    how ya doin chris

    11/20/09
  • Michael Walker
    Michael Walker

    holy shit dude, why is the TA stoppin for 6 months??? oh and congrats on the sentence... eh i mean engagement:L :L

    10/15/09
  • Holly Campbell

    congrats!! seen ur engaged in the paper, hope u got her a massive expensive ring :D

    10/8/09
  • Michael Walker
    Michael Walker

    Cool dude:) Yea i'll give you a shout wen i'm home like,

    9/20/09 via Mobile
  • luv Erlend Gilly Gilmour

    What like min ? Is that you back in freindly lands? lol. Sesh on jake! Time to kick back n relax :L :L :L

    9/8/09
  • Michael Walker
    Michael Walker

    wat like dude? bak 2 work on tue for a month can't be fuked like lol you'll need to come by next time in home though...

    8/30/09
  • luv Katherine M

    My flight's booked!! :) 14 sleeps! :) are you excited?

    8/26/09
  • luv Katherine M

    4 weeks today and we will just be taking off on our second flight of the day from edinburgh - gatwick!!!!! EXCITED!!!!! xxxxx

    8/22/09
  • Laura H
    luv Laura H

    You're very welcome :) . And i agree with you sayin, katherine told me this morning. That totally sucks and really not fair. X

    8/11/09 via Mobile
  • Erlend Gilly Gilmour

    in spain atm, al try read th email wen i cn. Take it easy

    8/10/09 via Mobile
  • luv Katherine M

    ha ha, i've got a bottle of the green stuff here, i just never got round to sending it to you! so your bollocks will be happy when you get home!! holy, i've certainly helped aberdeen's economy anyway - shopping til you drop is a tiring business!! i'm knackered!! xxx

    8/9/09
  • luv Katherine M

    oh go on, let me!! just back from the dounby show and i am sunburnt!!! and yes i did have suncream on! and i also now have millions of little freckles on my arms, dunno where they appeared from?? XXXXXX

    8/6/09
  • luv Katherine M

    ali just did a massive piss on me, right though my breeks and knickers and soaked to my skin!!!!! NOT IMPRESSED!! p.s. don't tell laura or she might not look after them this weekend......who am i kidding, of course she will! love you! xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

    8/5/09
  • Alan Marno
    Alan Marno

    bout ye!!!

    8/5/09
  • luv Katherine M

    i'm sure i'm gonna win the lottery tonight so i'll send a chopper for ya! have some love cos i have extra today! xxxx

    8/1/09
  • Erlend Gilly Gilmour

    Whats the crack dick knocker? how goes the hot country treatin you ? lol

    7/30/09
  • luv Katherine M

    hi xxx

    7/30/09
  • luv Katherine M

    i'll do anything you want if you don't subject these poor bebo people to photos like the ones on facebook! seriously, ANYTHING. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

    7/24/09