>BOLLIX----Pat Spillane or any Meath players or supporters - not forgetting the Dubs!!

>MIGHTY---Very good

>HAMES---A right shite-e.g.-"He made a hames of that chance"

>TIMBER---Intimidation of a hurling opponent - e.g.- "Show him some timber"

>LAMP----A good thump---e.g.-"I swung for the sliotar, missed by 3 feet
and lamped the full back"

>ACROWD!---A gathering of people who watch a match and hope for random
>acts of violence -e.g-Meath and Dublin supporters

>SCHKELP---To remove living tissue in the absence of surgical procedures
e.g.-"That shite from Tipp took a schkelp outta me leg"

>HATCHET MAN---Mountainy type, uses hunter/gatherer instincts

>BULLIN'---Angry-e.g-"The centre half was bullin' after I lamped him"


>BULL THICK---Very angry-e.g.-"The centre half was bull thick after
I lamped him again"

>JOULT---A push-e.g.-"I gave him ! a joult and he has to wear a neck
brace for 2 weeks"

>THE COMM-A-TEEE---Local GAA bullshitters in general

>BUSHTED---An undefined soreness-e.g.-"Jayz me arm is bushted"

>THE BOMBER---Popular name for a fat hairy GAA player

>A HANG SANGWIDGE---Consumed with "tay" on the sides of roads
after matches in Croker or Thurles, usually contains half a pound
of butter

>RAKE-A great amount of anything, usually pints of Guinness
the night before an important match
>INDANAMAJAYSUS (in-da-nama-Jaysus)--! -What was that for referee?

>YA BOLLIX YA---Corner back's formal recognition of a score
by his opponent

LEH-IT-IN-TA-FUCK-WUD-YA---Full forwards appeal to a
Midfielder for a more timely delivery of the pass

>MULLOCKER---Untidy or awkward player released for matches

>BURST THE BOLLIX---Instructions from the sideline to tackle
your man

>MILLEE---Disagreement involving four or more players

>MASSIVE MILLEE---Disagreement involving both teams,
including goalies,!substitutes and supporters jumping fences

>RUNNING MILLEE---A massive row that continues out in the
parking area or dressing room areas, usually resolved by
the Gardai

A girl walks into a supermarket and buys the following items:

1 Bar of Soap
1 Toothbrush
1 Tube of toothpaste
1 loaf of bread
1 pint of milk
1 apple
1 banana
1 orange
1 plum
1 grapefruit
1 tomato
1 lettuce
1 cabbage
1 baking potato
1 Kraft single
1 samosa
1 vegetable pakora
1 muesli bar
1 pie
1 frozen pizza
1 single frozen dinner
The bloke behind her in the queue taps her on the shoulder. He is carrying a basket with a six pack of Stella, a pizza and some Wagon Wheels.

As she turns he smiles at her and says, "Single, eh?"

The girl smiles sheepishly and replies, "How did you guess?"

He looks at her - straight in the eyes and gently says, "Because you're minging."