Chuck Norris uses redhot lava to moisturize his skin.

Chuck Norris invented the apple.

Chuck Norris Buillt Mount Everest with a bucket and spade.

Chuck Norris does not age. Every birthday, it's just another year added to his existence, which sucks for you.

Chuck Norris does not have chest hair, he has millions of highly venomous nematocysts. You have virtually no chance of surviving the venomous sting, unless treated immediately. The pain is so excruciating and overwhelming that you would most likely go into shock and collapse a split second before getting hit in the face with a roundhouse kick.

Chuck Norris can chug a gallon of milk and not throw up.

Chuck Norris beat the Sun in a staring contest.

If you get roundhouse kicked in the face by Chuck Norris in your dream, you DIE!

Chuck Norris can have his cake AND eat it too.

Chuck Norris was born in a log cabin that he built with his bare hands.

Some people get lucky and kill two birds with one stone. Chuck Norris once killed four birds with half a stone. What's that? You say there's no such thing as half a stone? The four dead birds didn't think so either.

Chuck Norris CAN lick his elbow.

P is for Chuck Norris, as is every other letter of the alphabet.

Chuck Norris puts the FUN in Funeral.

Chuck Norris' paradise is war.

Chuck Norris is capable of photosynthesis.

Chuck Norris has never had a surprise birthday party. He can NEVER be surprised. EVER.

Chuck Norris does not love Raymond.

Chuck Norris can lick his own elbows. At the same time.

Chuck Norris can kick start a car.

Chuck Norris doesn't breathe, he holds air hostage.

Chuck Norris wrote an autobiography....it was just a list of everyone he has killed.

Einstein's original Theory of Relativity was; if Chuck Norris kicks you, your relatives will feel it.

Bigfoot takes pictures of Chuck Norris.

As seen in Sidekicks, Chuck Norris can climb a rope with one hand, and one hand only.

Chuck Norris does not dance. He roundhouse kicks to the beat.

Chuck Norris can MAKE water run uphill.

Chuck Norris can hold Puff Daddy down.

The moon is actually a comet that was once on course to hit earth... then Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked it into orbit.

Chuck Norris can strike a match on a bar of soap.

Chuck Norris once played Russian roulette with a fully load gun and won.

The only reason the color pink still exists is because Chuck Norris is color blind.

Chuck Norris is allowed to talk about Fight Club.

Chuck Norris isn't afraid of Urban Legends, he is an Urban Legend.

Chuck Norris once played 18 holes of golf using a 12 inch strip of rebar and a sun dried tomato. He shot a 54.

On the Asian market, Chuck Norris' urine is worth $400 per fluid ounce.

See spot. See spot run. See spot get round house kicked in the face by Chuck Norris.

Niagra Falls is the result of one of Chuck's legendary cannon balls.

Chuck Norris performs colonoscopies on himself.

If you were killed by Chuck Norris, your tombstone would read RIP, ripped into pieces.

Chuck Norris' smile once brought a puppy back to life.

You know he jumped off the Empire State Building this one time and he only sprained his ankle.

Chuck Norris lost both his legs in a car accident....and still managed to walk it off.

Contrary to popular belief the Lottery numbers are not random. They are just the number of people Chuck Norris killed that given day.

Chuck norris invented the corndog.

The agent of Chuck Norris asked Chuck if he wanted to be in Brokeback Mountain. Chuck Norris' agent has been missing for almost 2 years now. Never ask Chuck Norris to be in a gay cowboy movie.

Chuck Norris IS RIGHT BEHIND YOU.

Chuck Norris understands the ending of 2001: A Space Odyssey.

Chuck Norris belives the hype.

Chuck Norris CAN in fact stop the beat.

When Chuck Norris crosses the street, the cars have to look both ways.

When Chuck Norris pic

Prop: randles!! (his d new john!!)
Hooker:
Prop:
Second row:
Second row: Sam (His a loser!!!!)
Flanker: shane (his shit)
Flanker: Me ( im soooo un real!!!!)
No.8: Rory (his d new kev walsh!!!)
Scrum-half: ByRnZy (his a fucking beast!!!!!)
Out-Half: Angie-poo!! (he will grab ur nipples!!)
winger (Laurence His so slow his fast!!!
1st Center: Eamon (hes scored 1try so far)
2nd Center: Ben ( he has 2 b nxt 2 Eamon!!!)
Winger: Kvin Phealen ( fuken idiot jus wudnt clap!! ha)
Full-Back: jack (He is d captain)

Supersub 1:
Supersub 2:
Supersub 3:
Supersub 4:
Supersub 5:
Supersub 6:
Supersub 7:
Reserve!: Maca

Jus rite 2 me nd tell me hu u wannabe
My girlfriend/boyfriend -
MY wannab girlfriend/boyfriend -
My mum - Sam O'Rourke
My dad -
My big sister - Jessie lee + Sam
My big brother- Ceire Irwin xxxx
My Sexy twin- Kim Hanrahan xxxxxxx
My oda twin- Jack mcGrath
My little sister- Kim Hanrahan xxxxxxxxx
My uncle -
My aunt -
My cousin - Jack McGrath
My daughter - Ben Drew
My sugar plum fairy - Kevin Byrne
My serious stoner friend - Jack mc Grath
My son - Sam
My brother-in-law -
My sister-in-law - Laurie Brosnan xxxx
My best friend - Sam xxxxxx
My other best friend - Ash Murphy xxxxxx
My niece -
My nephew -
My guardian -
My drug dealer- Mary Meskell xxx
My slave - Ben Drew
My shoppoholic friend -
My god mother -
My god father -
My siamese twin - Ceire Irwin xxx
My valentine -
My chatterbox -
My hot admirer- Aoife Doolan xxxxx
My oder hot admirer - Simon Keane
My kool sxy friend- Aine doolan xxxxx
My messer upper - Kevin Meade
My cleaner -
My lil alco - Ceire Irwin xxxxxxxx
My big alco - Bensen yaou
My stalker -
My style - Byrnzy
My drinkin frnd- luke mcGrath