Robbie Lee <robbie__lee>

The mexican fisher1/16/07
A boat docked in a tiny Mexican village. An American tourist complimented the Mexican fisherman on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took him to catch them. "Not very long," answered the Mexican. "Well, then, why didn't you stay out longer and catch more?" asked the American. The Mexican explained that his small catch was sufficient to meet his needs and those of his family. The American asked, "But what do you do with the rest of your time?" "I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, and take a siesta with my wife. In the evenings, I go into the village to see my friends, have a few drinks, play the guitar, and sing a few songs...I have a full life." The American interrupted, "I have an MBA from Harvard and I can help you! You should start by fishing longer every day. You can then sell the extra fish you catch. With the extra revenue, you can buy a bigger boat. With the extra money the larger boat will bring, you can buy a second one and a third one and so on until you have an entire fleet of trawlers. Instead of selling your fish to a middle man, you can negotiate directly with the processing plants and maybe even open your own plant. You can then leave this little village and move to Mexico City, Los Angeles, or even New York City! From there you can direct your huge enterprise." "How long would that take?" asked the Mexican. "Twenty, perhaps twenty-five years," replied the American. "And after that?" "Afterwards? That's when it gets really interesting," answered the American, laughing. "When your business gets really big, you can start selling stocks and make millions!" "Millions? Really? And after that?" "After that you'll be able to retire, live in a tiny village near the coast, sleep late, play with your children, catch a few fish, take siestas with your wife, and spend your evenings drinking and enjoying your friends."
first wend of dec, (nickname gluhwein)12/7/06
so i was all geared up and ready to go. girlfriend was comin over for all day saturday and all day sunday so i had spent the weekend cleanin the house and let me tell you, it was shinning. i hopped on the bus nd met Breda 50 min later at the airport. big hug n kiss nd we were straight back to ingolstadt. when we got there we shopped till we dropped, thank you kauf hof. wed built up a serious hunger and decided to hit the local italien restaurant for pizza, but the geniuses that we are we got two german style hotdogs beforehand in the christmas market so we were full to the brim.
the chrismas market is AMASING!!! wooden stalls nd christmassy lights everywhere. not to mention hot food, tradition sweeties like chocolate bananas nd not to forget gluhwein. which is warm sweet alcohol. breda really took to the gluhwein. =)
we also took a walk over the dannau river to feed the ducks nd have a race. that was that then. onto the next day.
went to mass in the massive church that was frrrrreezin. met the gang im friendly with, nd breakie in the local bakery. after all that we took a walk along the river to the dam just outside the town. before we knew it the day was over nd we had to head back to the airport. never the less we stopped into the christmas market one last time to buy some sweets for bredas little sis nd also one last gluhwein.
we got to the airport a little early. i will never forget the shock i got when i looked at the departures board and saw dublin flight was cancelled due to bad weather! so i was landed with herself till tuesday. secretly delighted tho. a few quick phone calls home and we decided to make the most of it. straight back to ingolstadt and we were nearly salsa dancing our way home. we had to hit sausalitos for a quick weiss beer and a sword/straw fight first tho. woke up the next morning and got the shock of my life. i realised i was allergic to german beer. stuff has too much yeast. i was left with red dots all over me. that aint gonna stop me. breakie in the town centre which consisted of more shots than anything else. outta nowhere then B says her wallet is missin. uh oh. fair dues to the germans cause they had found it and held onto it in the airportbus offices. by chance the place happened to beside an ice rink and an audi car museum so good job B. no chance of me going to lectures after that. as if the day hadnt enough hecups i managed to do a diving tackle with my blades up in the air into the side of herself. luckily enough all she was left with was a bruize. a real soldier that one. we grubed up in the museum after a quick tour and then on again homeward. weather was bad enough so we decided to buy a dvd and get an early night.
next day and we were up for 5am. 4 connected trains and 4 hours later and we were at the magical new schwanstein castle. i cant say enough about the place but what i will say is we were really impressed with the place. on the way back to the airport we hit munich for guess what...thats right another gluhwein. this time round the flight wasnt cancelled. all in all was a great wend. not without incidences but not with out entertainment.
oktoberfest and the no pants dance.10/12/06
was never really a big fan of drinking on planes before but id def recommend it now. this is how no pants night started. waitin in terminal to head to ger for erasmus. conveniently theres a pub right next to our gate. had a schnelles helles in about 5 min. few beers on the plane later nd was speakin fluent ger. im a real pro with beer in me. everyone understands exactly what im sayin. off the plane, train to munich and we met up with johns friends. straight to irish bar then. beer is so cheap! fast forward to bout 1 am and we were all headin home through the streets of munich. bright spark that is rob decides to go and just check to see if the fountain is in working order for a quick sec. looks good to me, better double check and put my foot in...wait....wait...yeah thats fine, but sure might as well get in and go for a walk. i got soaked. then we all decided to get in. good stuff! mr intelligent was the only one that decided to do a few lengths as if i needed the exercise when i was half pissed. anyway the end result was i had to walk home wid no pants on, even got served in mc d's and didn loose my wallet or phone.

following day was oktoberfest

as the story goes oktober fest was a riot. everyone drinkin 1 litre beers in massive old style tents. 1000s of people per tent and probably around 12 tents. all the germans wear traditional clothing that looks like a scene from braveheart or macbeth. they all sing loudly to. great craic.

so there i was, beer in hand, contimplating the year ahead when it occured to me that i had just drank 6 mass beers and was drunk. thats when john decides to go for a walk, a real man of experience, knows that fresh air either equals more room for drink or a big fight. so i novelly decide to tag along. dont ask me how but i would say we got 100 yards down the road when we were beatin the absolute heck out of each other. how is it that guys always do that? got up then when we were both black and blue, laughed it off and headed back for more beer. beer = immune to pain. didnt get very far as we were both fecked and in dire need of sleep hit the hey then which was round 6 pm in the evening.
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gettin ready to head off to munich soon. looking forward to it to be honest. im not really going to munich but really a small college an hour north of munich. with october fest and that you better believe ill be in munich!! john my bro is coming over to get the ball rolling for a week. stayin 5 min from octoberfest central.
after the hussle and bussle of that i have to settle into odopted home for the next year. the plan is to take it in my stride. everyone says how easy it is and just an excuse to go on the piss for the year.
that was pretty much the case the last time i stayed in germany for a month. went over with Gaz, a friend of mine, at the tender age of 16. we stayed with two loopy families who just wanted to see us drink "fire water 56%". during the days we just fluted around the school which may i add had a bar in it!!! WHAT SCHOOL HAS A BAR IN IT. so that was the way they do thing over there. we ended up having a few incidents in the school under the influence but thats another story. the janitor thought we were ledgends though. this time around ill get a job and unfortunately ill have to do some study to pass the year so i doubt ill be as much trouble.
the year is kind of split into two. ill be in ingolstadt until the middle of february and then im totally off until april. i think its around 6 weeks. back to college until july then. long year. all going according to plan ill be home a fair bit. flights are cheap so i might as well.
if anyone want some "gluhwein" or "sauerkraut" for xmas make sure ya put in an order good and early!
Accidents on irish roads7/17/06
Taoiseach Bertie Ahern said yesterday he hoped the sadness evoked by the high death rate on the roads would touch "the psyche of the community", writes Ruadh�n Mac Cormaic.

He was speaking after a weekend that saw six people killed on the Republic's roads, among them three teenage girls.

"It's like all of the accidents - they are horrific and they are all very sad stories for the families, for friends and for communities," Mr Ahern said.

"All we can continue to do is to urge people to show caution."

He added: "None of these accidents makes anyone other than very sad, and I hope that just gets through to the psyche of the community. The people who can do something about it, to be frank with you, are the people who are driving cars every day."

The year's death toll climbed to over 220 this weekend. In the latest incident, a 77-year-old woman was killed when she was struck by a car while crossing the road in the village of Dromineer, Co Tipperary, at about 1pm yesterday. She was Juliana Roberts from Dromineer.

In Co Kilkenny, 14-year-old Catherine Doyle, from Mile Post, Slieverue, was killed on Saturday evening when the car in which she was a front-seat passenger hit a wall at Hugginstown shortly after 8pm. Her body was removed to Waterford Regional Hospital, Ardkeen.

Less than 24 hours earlier, two 15-year-old girls died when the car in which they were travelling hit a ditch in Co Limerick.

The crash happened at 12.50am on Saturday at Killinane, Galbally.

Leanne Miller, of Kilteely in Limerick, died instantly. The second girl, who was a rear-seat passenger, died from injuries sustained in the crash in Limerick Regional Hospital yesterday morning. The girls had been returning home from a teenage disco in Co Tipperary when the car left the road on a bend. Two young men, one the driver, were treated in hospital for minor injuries.

Elsewhere in Co Limerick, a 20-year-old man died when the van he was driving was involved in a single-vehicle crash at Tournafulla at about 5am yesterday. A local, he was named as John Roche.

In Co Wexford, a 27-year-old motorcyclist, Stephen Cleary, from Clonskeagh, in Dublin, was killed when his bike collided with a car at 7am yesterday on the Arklow Road in Gorey.

A senior Catholic bishop said yesterday accepting the inevitability of carnage on the roads was not a Christian option.

In a letter read at Masses across the Diocese of Killaloe, Dr Willie Walsh said: "If each one of us takes more seriously our obligation to drive carefully, our obligation not to indulge in alcohol or other drugs when driving, our obligation to obey the rules of the road and not to ignore speed limits, then lives will be saved and we will have less broken-hearted parents, brothers, sisters and friends carrying a burden of sadness throughout their lives."

Only when those responsibilities are taken seriously can we demand that politicians, garda� and other road-users do the same, he added.

� The Irish Times

Someone tried to tackle David Wallace once but then found out you can't
tackle David Wallace.

The popular videogame "Doom" is based loosely around the time Satan
borrowed two bucks from Denis Leamy and forgot to pay him back

You are what you eat. That is why Paul O'Connells diet consists entirely
of bricks, steel, and the tears of small children

The eternal conundrum "what happens when an unstoppable force meets an
immovable object" was finally solved when David Wallace punched himself
in the face

Denis Leamy sold his soul to the devil for his ability to never feel
pain and unparalleled strength. Shortly after the transaction was
finalised, Leamy bounced the devil before dumping him on hiss ass and
taking his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay
mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker
every second Wednesday of the month.

The only thing we have to fear is fear itself... The only thing fear has
to fear is Paul O' Connell

Similar to a Russian Nesting Doll, if you were to break David wallace
open you would find another David Wallace inside, only smaller and

An Englishman once tried to throw a ball over Denis Leamy's
head......This has gone down as the biggest mistake in rugby history

When the Incredible Hulk gets angry he transforms into Paul O'Connell

Superman owns a pair of David Wallace pyjamas.

Denis Leamy once had a near death experience*needless to say death now
refuses to come near him.

On Moh's hardness scale, diamond is a 10. Paul O'Connell is an 11.

David Wallace wears a cup not to protect himself, but to protect the
players on the other team.

We all know the magic word is please. As in the sentence, "Please don't
kill me." Too bad Denis Leamy doesn't believe in magic

The world record for most simultanaeous female orgasms was set when Paul
O' Connell took off his top in Paris

David Wallace is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are
trademarked names for his left and right shoulders

Denis Leamy is Bruce Wayne

Paul O'Connell appeared in the "Mortal Kombat II" video game, but was
removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to run the
length of the screen and bust his opponent earning him a " Flawless
Victory". When asked about this "glitch," O'Connell replied, "That's no

As a child David Wallace used to hunt alligators in the Shannon. I know
what you are thinking: "There are no alligators in the Shannon".

Denis Leamy hates playing 'Rock Paper Scissors' because he doesn't
believe anything could beat rock. He always chooses rock, and when
someone throws paper, he says,"I win." If someone is foolish enough to
dispute this, he takes his clenched fist and punches them in the face,
then says, "I thought your paper would protect you."

Human females have two X chromosomes. Males have an X and a Y. Paul
O'Connell has three Ys and a P. He's more man than you'll ever be.

Denis Leamy Paul O' Connel and David Wallace once went to Wembley to see
England v Ireland in a soccer match. They stood in the middle of the
English crowd in their Irish jerseys. This has gone down in history as
the only time a whole stadium sang the away teams national anthem and a
minute silence was held for the home teams'
Biarritz :05/16/06
1st half - Biarritz to lead at half time, territory 50-50, munster higher tackle count, no sin bins but plenty of warnings against biarritz flankers.
2nd half - munster to win, less tries, maybe one overall, lineouts and ROG will be the only things that will have saved us.
if rog gets injured game over.
if doc plays well without getting sin binned, a last minute win seems likely
listen to hook and pope at half time!!

Players to watch
trialle - probably the best centre in the world, great boot, great step, great vision and a touch of french flair
yachvilli - has to be the best scrum half in the world, oppositions worst nightmare
lievermont - honest no8 with oodles of experiene, perfectly suited to the biarritz pack, will do damage to munsters game plan

rog - the only munster player capable of standing up to the strong boot of biarritz, munsters biggest/only hope
no.13 - unlucky number for whoever wears it. claimed a lot of players through injury this season

if any team can beat munster you would have to say it would be biarritz.
if any team can beat biarritz you would have to say to would be canterbury crusaders, unfortunately their busy playing the bulls in the semi of the s14.

considering the circumstances and considering the competition i think not even niel back can stop munster this time. munster all the way.